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31 March 2005

Springtime Means Sightseeing...


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pring has sprung here in Texas... To me that means "roadtrips"!! There's just so much to see and do here in Texas. One of the trips I enjoy taking is out west to Big Bend National Park. It's a long ride, about 10 hours, but well worth it. One of the things I really find totally awesome is at night. You're literally a hundred miles from any light... which means at night there are billions of stars spread out across the night sky. You have to stop your car, get out and stand in amazement as you look heavenward. It looks like one of those pictures you look at and say, "this is fake, there's not that many stars."


Then I usually make a yearly pilgrimage out to the Alamo in San Antonio. I don't know why, but I have a very definite connection to that place. An interesting side trip is to Bracketsville, Texas where the John Wayne film of The Alamo was shot. They rebuilt a little town to represent San Antonio for the movie and it has been the site for many movies and TV shows, including "Lonesome Dove." However, this year I may make a trip further north to where the newer Alamo movie was shot. They also re-created the Alamo structure. I've seen the Johnson Space Center a few times and that has kinda worn off. Then there's always Galveston...Everyone thinks Galveston is wonderful and great... and I guess in its' own way it is, but coming from back East where we have the entire Jersey shoreline with Atlantic City, Wildwood, and Ocean City, both in NJ and MD... Galveston is a bit of a letdown, except at Mardi Gras time. Then the place really jumps and comes alive.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

What site-seeing hot spots are there where you live? Is there one spot in particular that you just have to go every year? Buildings? I know our friends in Great Britain have tons of places and I love hearing about them, all the time. Oh, and do your places of interest allow cats? LOL Speaking of cats... I saw Easter going in the litterbox this morning!!! Yay!!

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
49. I use to watch Davy Crockett on TV when I was much younger with my Davy Crockett coonskin hat on.

48. As punishment, I had to watch Davy Crockett without my coonskin hat on. Same with my Mickey Mouse ears when the Mouseketeers came on.

47. Speaking of the Mouseketeers... I was totally in love with Annette Funicello on there. I wrote her a fan letter, gushing all over the place. I never heard back from her... Actually, I like to think she wrote back professing undying love for me, but it somehow got lost in the mail.

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

30 March 2005

The Easter Saga Continues...


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fter the phone call from the Vet last night I started questioning if I did the right thing in adopting Easter. The Vet informed me that Easter has ear mites and a tapeworm(s). She went over the items that she needed to do and the cost involved. She kinda indicated what I needed to do for these things. I am by no means a person of money. I'm on social security disability myself and every penny counts. I didn't mind putting out the initial money to make Easter comfortable in her new home, but this unexpected cost is surprising. $350.00 I should have known that there would be additional expenses but I didn't think and it never entered my mind that things could get a little dicey..


She told me that Easter will pass the tapeworm and it will shrivel up and die. Am I going to be finding tapeworms hidden all over the place now until this is over?

The Vet is giving me (selling) the medicine for the ear mites... eardrops. That should be fun. Now I'm glad Easter will be missing those front claws. I'll only have to worry about sharp teeth and the rear claws. She's also giving me a pill that I have to put into Easter's mouth and if I can't do it for whatever reason, bring her back and they will do it for me. Guess which option I'll be picking. There's just something about inserting my fingers into the mouth of any animal with razor sharp teeth to place a pill that the animal really doesn't want to take... I honestly really do need all my fingers... The Vet also suggested buying different litterbox stuff... because of the de-clawing her paws will be sore, so the Vet suggested this stuff they sell that's rolled up newspaper. This will prevent the normal litterbox stuff from getting between her "toes" and irritating them. So I guess today I'll be picking this new stuff up that I have to use for 10 days... until the paws heal.

But I know me... when I go at 10AM to pick her up and the first meow will melt away all concerns about everything I have to do... and everything will be okay. I do believe in things happen for a reason and there must be a reason for this... I really don't think God put Easter and me together to "break the bank."

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

So.... any tips from the cat people? Are there things I don't know about yet? Ear Mites? Tapeworms? Do's and Don'ts?

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
52. I am definitely not good at treating sick animals.

51. I am a sucker for sick animals.

50. I once put a band-aid on a birds foot, kept it for a few days and then left it go free. I often wondered if it survived. I also thought the bird would grant me 3 wishes out of my kindness. LOL

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

29 March 2005

One More Mouth to Feed...


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eet Easter... Easter is the new addition to my life. On Easter afternoon I received an excited call from my two daughters. "Daddy! Daddy! Guess what? We found a kitten!" "Wow, that's really nice guys" "And it's for you" "For me? How nice!" And so began Easters new life... rescued from a horrid life of drugs, prostitution and left-over mystery food while living and scrounging on the mean streets of Houston.

Before actually seeing my new roomie, I went to Petco and bought all the needed things: litter box, sleeping thing/couch/whatever, kitty treats, brush, food, bowls... $150.00 worth of things. Then over to pick up "Easter" She went into her new carrier without so much as a "meow"... I think she liked her new home... she came out of the carrier and walked around very gingerly looking at everything, examining every room in the apartment.

After about an hour she came over to me, meowed once, I picked her up and put her next to me... she curled right up and went to sleep after licking my hand. I guess we bonded right away.

Yesterday I took her for a ride... to the Vet. And the Vet took me for a ride as well. OMG, I went into shock... de-clawed, neutered, shots... my mouth dropped open. I thought, "geez, I must be helping to build an annex to the pet doctor's hospital here." $600.00!!! BUT, if I joined the club it would only be $99.00 now plus $19.95 per month and then the price dropped to about $200.00. "Easter" started licking my hand... I am a strong believer in "signs"... was this a sign? In my brain I could hear a voice, "oh go ahead you meany"

So, little "Easter" is at the Vets getting her "grease, oil and lube" job. They'll keep her over night to make sure she came through everything ok. I wonder if she'll hate me now? Does she miss me? Even though I only had her here a day, I already kinda miss her... even though there was nothing in her new litter box. I wonder where she was going? Oh well, I'm sure I'll discover her "spot" before long.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Do you have a pet? Any tips from you cat people?

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
55. I've only had one other kitten and that was about 10 years ago.

54. Growing up in Philly I only had dogs.

53. When I was a kid, I briefly had two little turtles as pets.

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

28 March 2005

Beauty in Stone


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imply awesome. I have no other words for these masterpieces. On Thursday of last week I went to the Galleria here in Houston. I needed new glasses and there was a Lenscrafters there. Why Lenscrafters? I get them in an hour. I'm not a patient person. However while walking around for that hour I came across a really talented person. His name is Francisco and he is a sculptor.


On display right there on the floor was his latest work called The Dancers and they are on the right shown here.

Simply amazing. It is 5 feet long and 6 feet high. Francisco said: "the sculpture was hewn from a 12 ton block of Colorado Yule marble was created over a one and a half year period with over 3000 hours of labor." It was simply amazing. Can you imagine working on something for 3000 hours?







His other masterpiece, "American Woman" was on national tour. The American Woman life-size marble sculpture has been on tour of the country. She has been exhibited in 15 shows in 13 major cities. This sculpture has already been on ABC, NBC and CBS News over 30 times, and over 50 newspaper articles and magazines. This piece is over 10 feet long and about 8 feet high.













As Francisco tours he signs and gives away free marble chips (the size of small bricks) that came from the original 21 ton block of marble for American Woman. So far he has signed over 15,000 marble chips and over 10,000 photos.

He graciously autographed a piece of stone for me. I know it's a bit blurry... but you get the idea. It says: March 24, 2005 To Denny: "American Woman" Francisco. Francisco has a website that you can visit: Francisco's Fine Art


Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Have you ever seen art up real close and personal? Or do you paint? sculpt?

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
58. I use to paint landscapes about 15 years ago, then stopped for some reason. I should start up again.

57. When I was in Italy I got to see "David" and the "Pieta", including the Sistine Chapel... simply awesome.

56. I never tried to sculpt anything unless you count a lopsided ashtray I made when I was 8 years old.

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

27 March 2005

The Answerman Comeths - Part 12 & Happy Easter


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appy Easter to Everyone! And what a great way to spend part of your Easter... with the Answerman...

I want to get this over with as quickly as possible cause I am heading out for dinner today, and don't want to be bogged down with a bunch of questions. Oh ok, now you're insulted... get over it. lol

First question...

Dear Answerman: If you were to live on a desert island, with nothing there at all, what five things would you take with you ...and why? Signed Fizzy


Dear Fizzy: I've given this considerable thought as you never know... one day I might find myself washed up on a small island in the Carribbean. You're question stumps me in a way. First you said "if you were to be washed up on a desert island, with nothing at all. Then, "what five things would I take along?" Firstly, I would take you along as I would need companionship. Second, an unending supply of wine... so we could toast our new world. Third, since we would be naked on the island we wouldn't need a washing machine so that's out. Oh, I know... music... we would need music to play by the fire when we would be drunk on wine and dancing. Fourth, a unending bottle of aspirin.. why? See number 3. And last but not least, Fifth, a boat hidden on the other side of the island so I could dump you if you got over-bearing. Hey, thanks Fizzy I enjoyed that :)

Second Question...Moving Right Along...

Dear Answerman: a burning question for the Answerman, what is Fishtown? What did they win? Signed dbdoberman


Dear db: I could spend days and days talking about Fishtown and trying to explain it. Fishtown is a real place in Philly... one of the neighborhoods along the Delaware River. Legend has it that Charles Dickens so named the neighborhood because of the numerous Fish Markets and sea Captains that dotted the neighborhood. As far as winning? Soccer... they have produced some really great soccer players... To read more, check out Fishtown Enjoy!

Third Question...I didn't think we'd get here...

Dear Answerman: Why is Easter the first sunday after the first full moon in spring? Signed NowDanny


Dear Now Danny: Easter occurs in spring, close to the vernal equinox. Specifically Easter falls on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the spring equinox unless the full moon is on the equinox in which case it is after the following full moon. Why does it move around, sometimes early in the spring, sometimes later? And what is the connection with the moon? Easter was always a very special holy day, far more than even Christmas a few thousand years ago. During this time, the true believers used to make a pilgrimage to the holy lands. Of course, in this day there were no trains, planes and automobiles, there was foot, camel and horse. Most traveled by foot. This presented a new problem because they needed to be able to travel after dark, and therefore needed some kind of light. What better light to have than the light of the moon? Pilgrims to the holy lands walked at night by the light of the moon. The only way to make sure they would have that light would be to have the holy day move around and follow the moon. A week after the full moon would have the moon rising late at night and being in the sky all night, very convenient for those traveling! Easter, and the Easter bunny himself might just have similar origins. Many cultures have told stories about a "hare in the moon" a bunny equivalent of our man in the moon. Rabbits were often seen as a symbol of sacrificial death. Eggs on the other hand, were seen as symbols of birth.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Whew... every so often the Answerman gets questions that beg to be answered properly. Sometimes he has to go to experts, sometimes he makes up his own answers which he likes better.

Questions for today: Do you have a favorite childhood memory of Easter? Do you remember how you discovered there was no Easter bunny?...



The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
61. On Easter my sister and brother would find more of the hidden Easter eggs than I did...

60. At Eastertime, it was time for a new suit. I would go with my father and before we went into the store he would tell me when we found the suit we (he) liked he would tell the salesman that it was too much money. I would then cry and say how much I liked it. We always got the suit at the price my father wanted to buy it for.

59. We always had to go out to the cemetery on Easter to put flowers on the graves of dearly departed family members.

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

26 March 2005

Why "Good" Friday?


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esterday I was on a blog and someone mentioned why was Easter called "Happy" since Christ was crucified and died. I corrected the person and reminded him that Christ didn't die on Easter, but Good Friday. Then I started thinking... why in the world do we call it a "Good" Friday? What was so good about it? Now please don't take this article wrong. I'm not making fun of, or getting santimonious, or religious but the subject of "Good" made me investigate it's origins.

The phrase "good Friday" does not appear in the Bible and neither does the word "Friday". The only day of the week given a name in the Bible is the 7th day, the Sabbath. The other days are designated as the first, second, third and so on. And remember, the Sabbath is a Saturday, not a Sunday as many people believe.

"Good Friday" is a construct of the apostate church long after Jesus' death.

Definition and etymology Good Friday, called Feria VI in Parasceve in the Roman Missal, he hagia kai megale paraskeue (the Holy and Great Friday) in the Greek Liturgy, Holy Friday in Romance Languages, Charfreitag (Sorrowful Friday) in German, is the English designation of Friday in Holy Week -- that is, the Friday on which the Church keeps the anniversary of the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ.

From the earliest times the Christians kept every Friday as a feast day; and the obvious reasons for those usages explain why Easter is the Sunday par excellence, and why the Friday which marks the anniversary of Christ's death came to be called the Great or the Holy or the Good Friday. The origin of the term Good is not clear. Some say it is from "God's Friday" (Gottes Freitag); others maintain that it is from the German Gute Freitag, and not specially English. Sometimes, too, the day was called Long Friday by the Anglo-Saxons; so today in Denmark.

According to Catholic dogma, which has largely been carried over into Protestant churches, Jesus was killed on Friday and resurrected Sunday morning, with the anniversaries of those dates observed as part of the Easter celebration.

A little research will show that "Easter" came about by the combination of a pagan holy day around the spring equinox, celebrating the false goddess Ishtar and the need felt by that apostate church to move its people away from the celebration of the Passover, the holy day given by God (G-D).<--- see comments why GOD is indicated by G-D

According to the Bible, Jesus was executed on Wednesday, dying in the afternoon, and remained in the grave until sometime late on Saturday, probably about sunset. I found this interesting and spent a few minutes trying to find if it mentions the 4th day as the day of the Crucifixtion... I couldn't find it. Not that it wasn't there I just got tired.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

What do you do on Easter Sunday? Have a huge dinner? Go to a dinner with family or friends? And for our Jewish friends, since Passover is near falling this year on 24 April, what do you do for Passover?

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
64. I call out the window and yell at stupid drivers. Well not so much now that I've matured.

63. I enjoy camping and always did when I lived back in Philly... but have never gone since I've been in Texas. Mainly because all the women I hooked up with never wanted to go.

62. I like all kinds of music, except heavy metal, rap, and something else that I've forgotten.

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

25 March 2005

Idle Mind... Devils' Workshop or Welcomed Rest?


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dle Mind... that describes my brain at the moment. In school the good nuns use to say "an idle mind is the devil's workshop." Man, is he working overtime right now because I don't have one, damn thought in there... Well, actually there are a lot of thoughts all generated by the devil. So what am I trying to say here? Well, it means I don't have a single thing to say this morning at 3AM... maybe I should have waited until 4AM to write today's article.

Lemme see here, what was another good devil related quote I use to hear when I was growing up in Philly from the nuns at Nativity School... "tell the truth and shame the devil." Actually I heard that one a lot. Oh wait, here's another good one, "A stale mind is the devil's breadbox." Geez, does my mind has a bunch of stale stuff in there today. All kinds of thoughts, but not any good ones. Since there appears to be a lot of people that come here from all across the world I bet y'all have some interesting 'sayings' or quotes about the devil... Actually your favorite quote don't even have to be devil related. Do you have a quote you find yourself using over and over again?

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Do you have a favorite devil quote? Either something that was told to you as a child? Or maybe something you use when your kids are bad? And we're not beneath making up our own devil quote either... give it your best shot and make the devil proud! lol ...and more importantly do you think I managed to skate through this posting without really saying anything? lol

Oh! Almost forgot... you can scroll down to the bottom of this page and see the video that goes with the music that's playing right now.

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
67. When I was in the 3rd grade I was absolutely and totally in love with my teacher, Miss Mary. Man was she hot, hot, hot! even though I was too young to know what hot! hot! hot! actually meant.

66. To make money when I was a kid, I use to go around everyday in the nice weather selling philly soft pretzels and call out, "all ready, FRESH pretZELS"

65. I love Scrapple and hate, hate, really hate and I am gagging just typing this: Liver and Onions.

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

24 March 2005

Which Magazine Subscription Would You Like?


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uccumbing to the advertisement on TV, I called this outfit that sells a popular weight loss pill. Yes, a miracle in a bottle. And because I was calling I was also entitled to a second bottle of pills free. Wow! I was going to be skinnier than Twiggy! I should have hung the phone up when the girl from the company tried to sell me a magazine subscription. I politely said "no" but did that stop her? Nope... she moved right on to "Flowers a Month" whereby I would receive a beautiful bouquet of fresh flowers every month to adorn my table. I couldn't take it anymore and said: "excuse me miss, I only want my fat pills, no magazines, no flowers...nothing."

I finally got her off the phone. Now I just had to wait for my package to arrive and within a month I would be a real hunk.

My miracle drug arrived... kinda big package for just two bottles. I opened it and there were 4 bottles. It seems I somehow enrolled in their weight loss, magazine and flowers club. Inside were my 2 FREE bottles plus my first order of 2 bottles and I only had to pay for the other 2 bottles which came to $127.50! I browsed through the book where it had instructions. Also there was a diet to follow... It was a starvation diet plan... of course I would lose weight. Plus as a bonus I got an excercise pamphlet. Geez, if I wanted to exercise and diet I would. I wanted my miracle drug where I could still eat a cheeseburger, pop a pill and it would vanish! I couldn't get to the phone fast enough. I dialed the number and selected option: Do you have a problem? I sat there for what seemed to be an hour before some teenage sounding girl got on. I told her I needed to return everything and I didn't want to be involved anymore. I lied and said my doctor strongly advised against taking these pills. "ok", she said... took all my information and where to return the pills. But before she hung up she asked me if I was interested in room deodorizers. I hung up. It cost me $5.87 at the post office to return my magic pills.

As an aside.. every morning I have a toasted bagel with butter. The day before I saw this show that claims one bagel is equal to 10 slices of bread! Ack! On the days I go to the bagel shop I buy 4. Since they are SO fresh and SO warm. I eat 2. Maybe I'll do better with weight if I cut down a little on bagels, huh? Hey, if anyone has a bridge in Brooklyn to sell, I might be interested!

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Have you ever ordered anything from TV only to find out you were taken? How about over the phone? Now come on, someone has to be a boob like me...

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
70. I have 27 statues in my apartment, ranging from mayan good luck gods/statues to Roman statues, to small busts of Washington, Jefferson and Franklin to Egyptian artifacts.
69. I think I snore, or so my 2 ex-wives have complained non-chalantly mentioned casually mentioned in passing.
68. I go barefoot all the time, except when I go to the store. If I moved to an Indian Reservation would I have to wear shoes to the store?

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

23 March 2005

Games I've Played


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emember when you were a kid? I can remember, many years ago, playing outside on the street in Philly. We could spend the whole day outside and no one worried... everybody knew each other and which kid belonged to who and where they lived.
One of the games that we played for hours or until our pennies ran out was simply, "Pitch Pennies". Any number of kids could play but it had to be at least 2 people. Each had a handful of pennies and we stood or knelt on the pavement, sometimes the street and "lobbed" a penny against a brick wall and watched where it dropped. The next kid did the same thing but he had to have his technique down because in order to win his penny had to land closer to the wall than everyone else's penny.
Another game was "wire ball". You would find a telephone cable that ran across the street up in the air. You and the kid you were playing against would stand on each side of the wire and throw a ball up into the air. The object was to hit the wire. That's how you scored points. You're excited aren't you? LOL
Of course the nickle pinball machine was always popular... we went into shock when they went to 10 cents.


Children in the early settlements of the 1600s had very few toys compared to today. They played leapfrog and hopscotch, flew kites and rolled hoops. Activity games, such as marbles and hopscotch have been played since even before the times of the Ancient Romans. Pitching games were very popular with boys, who pitched anything from marbles to horseshoes to pennies. Pitching pennies was actually a game called "Huzzlecaps."

We never had broken toys laying all over the house, mainly because there weren't a lot of toys around. We had to invent things... like penny pitch... if it was a bad day and neither of you had any pennies, you could always play for bottlecaps. They were metal back then, not plastic. Basically they were our introduction to Art. Bottle caps were colorful and you traded them as well.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

So what childhood games did you play? Did you have a favorite game? Do you see a difference between yesterday's games and the games of today?

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
73. I have a really small CD collection with 41 CD's as opposed to my DVD collection with 84. CD titles are here: My CD Collection
72. I always wanted to buy Ginsu knives. Ever see them on TV? They'll cut metal beer cans in half and then slice a tomato extremely thin. I've never bought any.
71. I actually wrote a book once about the oldest, still active cemetery in the entire nation. It was begun in 1732 and is still burying people. But you have to be a resident of Fishtown in order to be buried there.

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

22 March 2005

I Should Stick to Original Plans...


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esterday I mentioned in my article that I was supposed to attend a focus group in the afternoon. I should know by now that I should stick to my original plans. Did I go to the focus group and give them my opinions on such matters as legal cases, or which can of soda I enjoyed more? No... what did I do instead?? I had a loose tooth and it was beginning to really annoy me. Now you're getting the idea of where I went instead... yes, the dentist AGAIN. Our conversation kinda/sorta went like this:


Dentist: Oh yes, I see... see how it wiggles, see how it hurts when I twist it?
Me:

Dentist: We need to pull it, we can't save this one.
Me:

Now normally, she over-loads me with pain killers and I don't feel a thing. However this time she said,

Dentist: We're going to try something different, we're not going to load you up... just a milder form of anethesia."
Me: uh huh
Me: OUCH
Dentist: Mr. Shane I didn't do anything yet, I was just preparing the area. Now I'm going to give you a little injection for discomfort. Here goes...
Me: OUCH! OUCH!
Dentist: Just relax a minute. Open wide... wider... WIDER please? Mr. Shane, (sigh) I really can't pull the tooth with your mouth shut.

So I close my eyes and open my mouth... WIDE. She starts to pull. I let out a loud OUCH... or words close to that effect. She pulls away... "Did that hurt?" Sheesh.

Dentist: Ok, open up again and we'll try once more"
She puts the pliers or whatever they were into my mouth, grabs the tooth and yanks it out in one full swoop. The pain was like an arrow being shot into my brain.

Driving home with a mouth full of gauge, I kept saying over and over: "Idiot! Idiot! You should have gone to the focus group!"

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Are your experiences with your dentist enjoyable? When the dentists says, "This isn't gonna hurt at all" Do you believe them? Would you believe that a long time ago I read that the highest suicide rate in the country belonged to one group: Dentist. Now why doesn't that bother me?

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
76. My favorite Chinese dinner is: Egg Roll, Won Ton Soup, Hunan King Fried Rice and Garlic Shrimp
75. I can eat left-over pizza the next day but then have to throw whatever is left-over out. I can't save it for 2 days.
74. I have a subscription to National Geographic. So far I've gotten 7 issues and have only read 2.

If you really want to see my uptodate 100 Things.

Do you hear any music at all when you come onto this blog? I want to have some nice, soft music playing to soothe your nerves, but I am not sure if I've coded it right. I thought I did, no one can hear it except me. Can anyone hear it?

20 March 2005

What Time Is It? Who Are You?


T

oday started off much like every other day. Last night I went to bed about 10:30PM I guess. I have never used an alarm clock... ever. I simply think of the time I want to get up and somehow, I don't know how... I wake up at that time, give or take a few minutes. This afternoon I'm taking part in a focus group but that's not until 2PM... so I don't know why I would wake up at 4AM this morning... but anyway, I woke up, looked at the alarm, 4AM, got up and out of bed and started my morning routine. Put coffee on, turned on computer, went to bathroom...

By that time the coffee was done. Came back in and sat down and got myself ready to start doing whatever. I looked at the computer clock and it said 12:30AM. That's odd, maybe the clock battery in the computer was slowing down and I needed another. I opened up the utility to change the time and got up to go into the kitchen to look at the wall clock so I could enter the correct time. It stunned me... 12:32AM! What the... I walked into the bedroom to look at my alarm clock... 12:32AM. This was not good... laugh. Honest to God that alarm clock said 4AM when I woke up.

So here I sit now at 1:00AM wondering what to do... You people in the UK should be glad I don't have your phone numbers... I'd be calling right about now. I am a strong believer in "things happen for a reason" except now I am wondering why I should be awake. I could start calling everyone I know to make sure they're ok... I'm sure they would appreciate my concern at 1:15AM.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

I bet you know what today's Burning Question is, huh? Has this happened to you? Not just wake up and go back to sleep... I mean wake up, get out of bed and start your day and then realize you're about 3 or 4 hours off? Anybody want my phone number and they can call me? I do have a question for anyone... I want to put the little newspaper here, like the one over there on the right column, with a headline from the Curiosity news on it... you click on it and a pop up comes up with that article. How the hell do I do that? What is the code? I have tried all kinds of combinations and it won't work...

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
79. Sometimes I wake up at strange hours of the night and think it's time to get up. Ahem.
78. When it's 1AM and I am on the computer, I am usually naked.
77. Sometimes I don't know when to stop typing.

That's it... I wonder if I have any sleeping pills. Coffee, sleeping pills.. what a combination.

Arthot Answer Bărbat A veni Part Ascensor


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his week we salute our friends in Romania... the Answerman has traveled there many times searching for answers to your questions. We are gaining momentum there... last month we had two people from Romania visitng our little Blog... this month we've hit a 100% increase and are up to 4 viewers. So anyway, here I am once again to save the day and answer all of your burning questions that you have not been able to find the answers. I have all of the answers... there's not a question out there that I cannot answer... even if I have to make up my own answer to fit the question.

Anyway, let's get moving along here as I am really very busy today. But before I go I just wanted to say I love what you did to the place Denny... very nice... now can we do something with my dressing room?

First question...

Dear Answerman: How often is it necessary for a single guy to clean out his fridge? Signed dbdoberman


Dear db: This is a very good question db... As you know I'm single as well so I'll just tell you how I handle that situation. You shouldn't expend any energy on it at all. I usually wait until right before a date and clean it out. I don't want her to think I'm a slob or anything. Of course it's been about 4 years since I cleaned it. I play a little game called "Guess what I am?" And the meatloaf always gets me... how can meatloaf look like soup? If you do wait to clean it between dates you can always know when your last date was by looking at the expiration date on the milk carton.

Moving along...

Dear Answerman: Oh Answerman, where were you last week? Confess. Signed blue2go


Dear blue2go:Where was I last week? What kinda question is that? That's really delving into my personal life. How would you like it if I asked "blue2go, where were YOU last week?" But seeings you're a long time reader, I'll answer your question. I was with Monique, owner of Moniques House Calls, Stucco Siding and Shopping Mall Owner. I guess I could make up some kinda cool, sexy story here... a story including getting drunk over at the Mollytown Bar & Grille, then crawling over to Monique's for a nightcap... (wink wink), then she went upstairs and I crawled up after her... this is where it gets fuzzy. When I got there she was in a black cat woman's outfit and had a whip in her hand... ummm I forget the rest.

Our Last Question... yawn, stretch...

Dear Answerman: How do they get the salt and butter in those little kernels of popping corn? Signed Barb in Jersey

Dear Barb in Jersey: I thought I better check with an expert on this subject since I didn't want to give you a wrong answer. I went and saw "Fatty" Pickens, part owner of the Perpetual Flea Market. who specializes in useless information and junk. "Well now Answerman, as you may be surprised to find out, Dolly and Lolly's old Lollipop factory over on Molly Lane at one time use to be a popcorn factory. That's right, the Dolly and Lolly Popcorn Factory... they ran it with a cousin named Orville... I don't think he ever amounted to much. However the popcorn biz when belly up because they couldn't figure out how to get the butter and salt into each kernal either. They tried injecting each kernal with a hypodermic needle filled with butter and salt but the little needle thingy kept getting clogged with salt grains. I heard a ways back anyway. that cousin Orville started his own popcorn factory and got pretty big. I think he perfected the old butter and salt in the needle thing." I heard enough and took this info with me over to the Mollytown Bar & Grille... I needed a drink.

[DISCLAIMER]: The Answerman is always right, even when you might think he is wrong.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

I don't know how the Answerman does it... he keeps coming up with the answers all the time. It's almost as if he makes the answers up, but he swears he doesn't. And don't forget, if you have a question that you desparately need an answer for, please address it to the Answerman in the comments section on any day.

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
82. I have 8 bottles of wine sitting in/on my state of the art wine rack... all red wine. I'm not too crazy about white.

81. There's at least one thing in a tupperware container in my freezer that I honestly have no idea what it is.. and I really should throw it out.

80. I have 85 DVD's of favorite movies in the video library.

19 March 2005

Can We Legally Kill People Now?


W

hat a struggle in Florida over Terri Schiavo, the poor woman who has been living on life support for the past 15 years. As you may or may not know, her feeding tubes were removed yesterday and is expected to die in 7 to 14 days. Even Congress got into the act with one side actually subpoenaing Terri to appear before them later this month, and thereby prohibiting the tube removal for at least a month... the other side of the aisle wants her tubes removed. When did we start playing God in this country? "Ok, you can live..." "sorry Miss you're a little too sick." "Ok, we have way too many people with last names beginning with P, sorry guys we need to thin out the ranks."

I know, I know, that's stretching it but... We're one of the few countries left in the world that still employs the Death Penalty, and that's on the wane even... well unless you're from Texas like me... For many years we held the #1 spot in the nation for executions. Is mercy killing replacing our thirst for death?

Having said all that I sit here typing this out and thank God I am not in the shoes of anyone making this decision. I couldn't. But what I do think is that if it comes down to who has the last word... I think it should be her parents. They brought her into this world, etc. Shrug. Unless perhaps there were grown children involved and then possibly the husband and grown children as a family unit. And I'm sorry if today's article was a bit of a downer, but every so often something intelligent does float through my brain.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Do you have any feelings one way or the other? If you're married have you discussed it with your spouse? or written it down anywhere?
Or, if you don't want to deal with this subject... what's on your mind today? And we won't hold it against you either way... Promise!

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
85. I collect Stamps. I started when I was a kid. Then I was dating a girl, and in an effort to really get in good with her I gave her brother my stamp album to get him interested in stamp collecting. How dumb was I? But I started it up again and have 4 HUGE albums filled with stamps.

84. I have at least 1 plug-into-the-wall air freshener in each room of my apartment and of the 8 plugins, only 1 has stuff in it. (Now isn't that something you were wondering?)

83. I was saving #83 here for my bank balance but that's way too depressing.

See y'all tomorrow! And don't forget what Sunday is... The Answerman Cometh! If you have any burning questions and just can't find the answer... leave your questions in the comments section today. You'll get your answer tomorrow, if the Answerman shows up for work that is... And remember, in the event of a tie, the Answerman always wins!

18 March 2005

We're Not In Kansas Anymore Toto


E

ven I'm amazed, at how cool this blog makeover turned out! It's like waking up Christmas morning and finding all the gifts. Many thanks has to go to the designer, "seven", Blog Developer Extraordinaire.


He simply took my ideas and ran with them... never complaining about what a pain in the ass I had become! Laugh I think this is going to be fun watching it develop. I'm so happy with the way things turned out with this blog, that I am considering having Monique's Shopping Mall re-vamped! God knows it needs something... like customers maybe! LOL

But I do want your input. Let me know if anything doesn't look right to you... It all looks fine at my end but many of us have different systems and setups... what might look great to me might be a pile of garbage to the next person.

I'll be back later, but for now I wanna run around and look at things, more importantly I want to play with stuff!

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

I would highly recommend seven for all of your design needs. His website is located at Blogs Gone Wild

17 March 2005

Happy Saint Patrick's Day


S

lainte'... It just dawned on me that I should have saved all the little Irish icons that I used the other day for this posting today. Now I've got Nothing! Zippo! Zilch! НИЧЕГО! Nada! Rien! Nichts! Non niente! 没有什么东西!Laugh.......

Erin Go Bra, Baby!

I used all my little Irish icons and could only find this one that I liked for today. Therein is my problem. I do not "save for a rainy day", nor do I believe in "put off today what you can do tomorrow" and my favorite "who cares if it's July and my birthday is in March... gimme my present NOW" I have to do it right now! A good example of this was back in August and I was in a computer store. I saw this neat flat screen monitor. I was just getting tired of my old, huge bulky one that took up half the desk and never fit anywhere. I thought, I'll wait until the price comes down a little bit more... maybe in a few months. I actually thought that all the time lifting the new monitor box into my shopping cart and paying for it at the register.

Since I make up my daily blog "on the run" so to speak, with very little for-thought... I know we have bloggers from the UK that come here... is St. Patrick's Day celebrated there? I have a feeling it might be more of a celebration here than over in the UK.... except for Ireland I would imagine. And while I'm thinking of it, stop by my cousin Fran's website Bogside Rogues

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Do you celebrate your nationality with a special day and when? Do you have an interesting St. Patty's Day party story to tell us? Ever been to an Irish wake? (body is in the living room and the party in the kitchen. Some of my best parties have been at funerals!) Not Irish? No Problem... make up your own story!

One for the Road...


A man stumbles up to the only other patron in Malloy's Bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply.
The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of Course," replies the second man.

Curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?"
"Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin."

"Of course," replies the second man.
Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?"
"Saint Mary's," replies the second man. "I graduated in '65."
"This is unbelievable!," the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '65, too!"

About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?," he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Malley twins are drunk again."

16 March 2005

I Finally Admit It!


T

oday, I stand tall and announce to the world, "I am coming out of the closet!" Yes folks, I am admitting it for the first time anywhere... you are reading it first... the burden has been over-whelming. Here goes: deep breath I am a Court TV freak. Wow... I am so much more relieved now.

This secret that I have been harboring for all this time is finally out in the open and I am so relieved. If, I'm not here playing around in Blogville, I'm usually over on Court TV.!
I know the other day in the Burning Questions section I asked about MJ, Blake and Peterson... but today is the sentencing day for Scott Peterson!

I really hope they have the camera on his face when we find out if he will be bunking with "Sally" for the rest of his life, or meeting with Lacy in the afterlife. Personally, I don't think Lacy will be anywhere near where Peterson is heading. Anyway rehashing this story is not the focus of today's entry, even though it very easily could be. NEWS FLAH from the "Not So Normal News Department: This just in! Peterson: Death - Sarah Johnson: Life

Today's entry is about television and favorite shows. Aside from Court TV, I watch reruns of Stargate - SG1.

For some strange reason I prefer watching the reruns as opposed to the current, up-to-date show on Monday nights. But hey, what else would be new in My Anything But A Normal Life? Right? I have a TV here across from the desk and it gets turned on in the morning to catch Good Morning America then the channel gets flipped over to Court TV. That's pretty much where it stays all day, except for local and ABC Evening News with Peter Jennings... after he reads my Blog for his news items, as we already found out, until Stargate comes on and the courts are usually done for the day. Weekends are up for grabs with movies or maybe a few DVD movies.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Which are your favorite TV shows? If you're from outside the U.S. and you watch a local show, you might have to explain it a little. And please... do not put down 60 Minutes or National Geographic, when you really watch The Simpsons! Is there a show on TV that you will absolutely, under no circumstances watch?

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

87.I love vanilla fudge ice cream.

86. I have 29 pictures/items hanging on the walls of my office where I am right now. (doesn't count pictures on my desk shelves) 3 paintings in my bedroom on the walls. 1 in my bathroom and 16 paintings in the dining room and living room.

14 March 2005

Beware Today!


B

eware the Ides of March. Coming on the heels of yesterdays' comments regarding calling off work... today is a good day to call off if you're a little superstitious and your name begins with a J!

I'll betcha didn't know that Julius had a sister named Julia. Julius and Julia Caeser. Sextus Julius Caesar and Marcia of Rome weren't too original when it came to naming their kids. As a matter of fact, their other daughter was named Julia as well.

Unwittingly following their naming pattern, my first wife and I weren't all that original ourselves. Her name is Joanne, our daughter is Joanne. My name is Denny and we have a son Denny... and another son Chris. Now imagine us all at my sister's house on Thanksgiving sitting around the table with her kids where there's Chris and Danny... and to round things out, my brother's wife is Joann.

So, let's recap... we have: at one table, all calling to each other and talking: Big Joanne, Little Joanne, Jerry's Joann, Big Denny, Little Denny and Christopher Victor, Christopher Mark and Danny. My son Denny has a son and Denny continued the tradition and called his son Christopher, my daughter Joanne married Mike and they have a son named Mike. Then to just complete the picture we have my parents, Dot and Harry. When I was born my birth certificate says Harry Dennis Shane, but the Catholic Church wouldn't baptize me because Harry was not a Catholic name. So the church wrote in Henry. So my birth cert says Harry Dennis but my baptisimal cert says Henry Denny. So now I'm Henry Harry Dennis (John: confirmation name) Shane.

Can you see why I am seeing a psychiatrist on a regular basis? Laugh...

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

So do you have any name problems in your family. Come on, don't lie... yes you do. What are they... that way we can all point and laugh.

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
89. At one time I had a summer home, in NJ, which sat lakeside overlooking the water obviously, and sitting amongst the trees, squirrels. Sigh...

88. I have gone to at least one major league baseball game every year. This year it is opening day at Enron Field Minute Maid Park when the Astros face off against the St. Louis Cardinals. Look for me on TV... my seat is 2 rows directly in back of ol' George and Barb. My first baseball game was at Connie Mack Stadium, long since gone, in Philly.

Hung Over?


H

appy Monday!, You made it through the weekend and came back. Great! You got through all the parades and parties in one piece. It's just a shame how the holiday falls... on a weekday but all the festivities are held on a Sunday. Lemme think here... this year Paddy's day falls on Thursday. But on a positive note, it falls on a Friday next year and the following year a Saturday... talk about hangover heaven!

Ring, ring! Hello Boss? I can't make it in today because...

I can remember a few St. Patty's Day hangovers and calling off work. As a matter of fact we can throw in the day after Christmas, New Year's, my birthday of course... who works on their birthday anyway. Let's see... then there were the 4th of July hangovers... Easter... You know what? To save space, just pick a holiday and I usually called off the next day. The only time I never called off was when I was in the Navy... Ugh... I had no choice.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

1. So what excuses have you used to call off from work?
2. What one holiday on the calendar do you really over-do it?

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

Continuing with my list:
91. One of my favorite meals is Linquini and Shrimp (Italian Hot Sausage) with tomatoes, broccoli and scampi seasonings. A major downfall of mine is Italian bread... I miss Italian bread from back home in Philly. However, recently I discovered breads from the LaBrea Bakeries. Unbelievably good! You can go to their website www.labreabakery.com and click on the map where you live. They'll tell you where to buy it. Do it, you won't be disappointed. And my favorite is Roasted Garlic.

90. I have 2 baseballs on my desk...one I got Nolan Ryan to autograph and the other I got autograph's from: Robin Roberts from the Phillies (Roberts ranks as the winningest righthander in Phillies history - Played 1948-1966, Duke Snyder (aka The Lord of Flatbush for the old Brooklyn Dodgers) and the third on that ball is Pete Rose when he played for the Phillies.

Ok, that's it for the list today...

13 March 2005

The Answerman Doesn't Cometh


T

he Answerman called last night... he decided to take the whole day off in order to attend the infamous St. Patty's Day Parade in downtown Mollytown. I don't get the opportunity to attend such events, however from what I've heard this parade rivals the Mardi Gras parade in New Orleans. But because he is dedicated he did phone in a few Irish jokes from the Mollytown Bar & Grille, operated by Emma Pickens-Pickens, former wife of both Orville "Slim" Pickens and then his brother "Fatty" Pickens.!...

Between sloshing green beer, he started his first story:

Paddy, the famous Irishman, is driving home after downing a few at the local pub. He turns a corner and much to his horror he sees a tree in the middle of the road. He swerves to avoid it and almost too late realizes that there is yet another tree directly in his path. He swerves again and discovers that his drive home has turned into a slalom course, causing him to veer from side to side to avoid all the trees. Moments later he hears the sound of a police siren and brings his car to a stop. The officer approaches Paddy's car and asks him what on earth he was doing. Paddy tells his story of the trees in the road when the officer stops him mid sentence and says, "Fer goodnessakes, Paddy, that's yer air freshener!"

Monique from Monique's Home House Calls, Stucco Sidings and Mollytown Mall wanted in on the joke tellin' but we had to wait a few seconds until she got off the floor "Hey Dennybabe, tough week huh? You need to drive out here for some rest and relaxation honey. Anyway I got a cute one for ya": An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman go into a pub and each order a pint of Guinness. Just as the bartender hands them over, three flies buzz down and one lands in each of the pints.

The Englishman looks disgusted, pushes his pint away and demands another pint.
The Scotsman picks out the fly, shrugs, and takes a long swallow.
The Irishman reaches in to the glass, pinches the fly between his fingers and shakes him while yelling, "Spit it out, ya little bastard! Spit it out!"

I heard the phone drop a few times then A.H. Johnson - Owner of Johnson's Party Favors & All Night BBQ. And also a distant descendant of Pharoah al Hassad Johnson, alleged inventor of the condom took over and slurred this one: An Irishman who had a little too much to drink is driving home from the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all over the road.

A cop pulls him over. "So," says the cop to the driver, "where have ya been?"
"Why, I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk. "Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite a few to drink this evening."

"I did all right," the drunk says with a smile.
"Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms across his chest, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"

"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."

Not to be outdone, Harvey "Digger" Graves, Jr. who owns and operates Graves Funeral Home and Used Jewlery Store on Mollytown Blvd jumped in with: "In a drunken stupor, Ole McSweeny staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a confessional box, sits down but says nothing. The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention but the Ole just sits there. Finally, the Priest pounds three times on the wall. The drunk mumbles, "ain't no use knockin, there's no toilet paper on this side either."


Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Well that's pretty much it for today. Answerman said he might call in later and answer questions... but to be honest gang, I would trust anything he would be saying by then. If you're going out to any of the St. Patty's Day parades today remember, please drink and crawl responsibly!

12 March 2005

I'm Just Tired!


P

lease shoot me. OK gang... I installed Haloscan on here. It's also working as opposed to the last time I installed it. I'm tired of screwing around between here and Blogspirit. For now, I'm going to use this blog!

Don't Go To The Other Place!?

I'm still gonna play around a little over there but for now this is home. I think I'll be staying here... with all it's faults I know how to do things here... except make it go faster. LOL

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

For putting up with all this nonsense... If you ever come this way to Houston, I buy you a drink, or two, maybe three...


Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Just For The Weekend


P

lease go to the other blog at New Blogsite for today and tomorrow, Saturday and Sunday. I'm going to play around over there, then make a decision on Monday morning.

Thanks for putting up with me.... LOL

Denny

11 March 2005

MJ or Blogger?


W

hich should be shot? I was equally furious with both Blogger and MJ yesterday. First with Blogger for being sooooo slow. Secondly for the circus in California that the taxpayers are paying for... Did he actually think anyone would buy his act? But what really sent me up the wall was when the judge back-peddled on his statements.

Anyway, nothing is going to put me in a bad mood today. Because, it's my birthday!! and my sisters birthday in NJ. Born on the same day only 4 years apart.

Ah, I remember the old days when our birthdays came around... y'all remember I mentioned previously how my dad and sister would drop me on my head to pass the time? Birthdays were no exceptions... He's 5 years old today!! One, thud... Two, thud... Three thud. Everyone got a turn. Since it was my sister's birthday also, she got a few extras for good luck. As I lay there slipping in and out of a coma, I could hear: "Awww Denny is still sleeping, go ahead and blow out his candles also.... here's one of his presents for you also."

Today I am going to just live with total abandonment... I'm not gonna check for typos!! Actually, I'm done writing also! Because it's my birthday? NO! Because I've written this stupid thing 3 times already and for some reason I keep hitting the damn delete key... this is the 4th version and I can't remember all the really cool things I wrote about in the first 3 versions.

The 100 Things Countdown Continues

96. You may know my Great Grandparents... Roderigo Diaz and Donna Jimina? Such a fun loving couple. They lived in Campeador Bivar, Spain and were my 29th Great Grandparents. He went under the name of "el Cid" most of the time.
95. I have 2 TV's, 2 VCR's and 2 Stereo's and 14 remote controls... 2 of which I have no idea at all what they are for.
94. I love horror, science fiction and murder movies.
93. I really, really hate when I write an entire blog entry and somehow hit the delete button instead of the enter button.
92. Remember the Kukla, Fran and Ollie Show? I can remember the names of the 3 stars in alphabetical order: Fran, Kukla and the third one.... geez, I know the name like the back of my hand... I hate when this happens.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

1. Since it's my birthday, what, if you could give me an imaginary birthday gift... what would it be? Note: Imagenary money is no object either.
2. MJ, guilty or innocent?
2a. Robert Blake? guilty or innocent?
2b. Scott Peterson? electric chair, lethal injection or life in prison?
3. How many remote controls do you have, either working or non-working?

10 March 2005

Blogwork/Housework


M

an-o-man... being a Blog Conglomerate is hard work. I can remember way back when I first started this blog. I could wake up, get coffee, check the previous days blog for comments, answer them, go monkey around on other blogs, come back, begin writing the blog for the day all in a half hour. How times have changed... man this morning I woke up and 2 hours later I am finally getting around to write today's Blog and I haven't even goofed off yet on other people's Blogs. Laugh

Whew! I Need a Rest Already!

But ya know what? I love it! The more people that come... the more people that leave comments... well, let's just say I have put off housework indefinitely.

While I am thinking about it, please check over on the left side for the newest Blogs on the Almost Normal Members of the Almost Normal Club. I've done something new and added the word NEW so you can pick them out easier. If by chance, I've missed someone, let me know and I'll fix it.

I need to get back to writing about different things and not write about my Blog... just that the last few days and today there's way to much to talk about. Anyway, below is #98 and #97 on my 100 List. I hope you enjoy the list cause my brain doesn't. It's working overtime trying to remember things. Today's item was a killer... so many people, so many years. Laugh.

The 100 Things Countdown

98. Politicians I've Known or met... I've either been in close proximity to, or met in person or had dinner with the following the following national politicians: Harry S Truman - 33rd President of the US, Dwight D. Eishenhower - 34th President of the US, John F. Kennedy - 35th President of the US, Lyndon B. Johnson - 36th President of the US, Richard M. Nixon - 37th President of the US, Gerald R. Ford - 38th President of the US, Ronald Reagan - 40th President of the US, George Bush, Sr.41st President of the US, George W. Bush, Jr. - 43rd President of the US, Nelson A. Rockefeller - VP under Ford, J. Edgar Hoover - Head of the FBI, Earl Warren - Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, Barbara Bush, Jacqueline Kennedy, Mamie Eishenhower, Nancy Reagan, Bess Truman. I was 13 years old when I met Truman, Eishenhower and Kennedy and Johnson. As some of you know, I spent 20 years in politics in Philly. It was an extremely interesting time in my life. Maybe in another post I write about other people I've met along the way.

97. I Got the Pope's Bell! Talking about politics... one day I went into City Hall to talk to the Mayor of Philly... Frank L. Rizzo. After our chat he called in his secretary and told her to get me a Liberty Bell. These bells were prize items that the Mayor gave to visiting dignitaries. She came back in with two bells. One large one and one small one. She said, "Mr. Mayor, don't forget the Pope is coming next week and we only have one large and four little ones until the new shipment comes in." He thought about it for a second, then reached out and took the BIG bell and gave it to me. Then he told her to bring in 3 out of the four little bells. He gave me 3 little bells for each of my kids. The following week, Pope John Paul II visited the city... in the paper the next day was a picture of the Mayor giving the Pope a Liberty Bell... uh huh, the smaller bell. Laugh... But the Pope also got other things also so he didn't leave empty handed. Laugh Too funny!

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

1. Have you ever met anyone famous or infamous? Criminals? Movie Stars?
2. Have I forgotten anyone to add on the Blog List on the left?
3. How much time, daily, do you spend on your own personal blog? i.e. writing, etc.
4. Also, Baseball tickets are now available for sale over in Monique's Shopping Mall.

09 March 2005

My 100 Things List


W

ell, I guess I had to succumb sooner or later to this blog craze of listing 100 things you "think" people want to know about you. However, most blogs that I have seen list all 100 things at once. Big mistake! I'm going to give you my 100 things, 5 at a time! I give you 5 today and then say next week I'll give you 5 more! Now you'll have to come back at least 20 more times to read my entire list! Pretty damn sneaky and smart on my part, huh? I told you guys yesterday that I am a numbers guy... I always want bigger and more!

Please! Not Another 100 Things List

I haven't even put any thought into this exercise... I'm sitting here thinking as I type. I like living dangerously. By the time I reach my 100th item, you are going to sit there and think, "Wow... what an amazing guy!" And girls, if I haven't mentioned it before, I am fully single, so I am available!

I just took a deep breath... here we go... but wait a minute! I wonder if it makes any difference if I list the 100th item first and work my way to number 1? With #1 being the most interesting thing about me. Suspense, yes, suspense is the name of the game. If I do it that way you will definitely come back to see what was #1. Pretty damn clever if you ask me. I just knew all those years of a good Catholic education would pay off one day! I can tell you're sitting there thinking, "I wish this guy would stop screwing around and get to the damn list" Actually all of a sudden I thought that items 100 to 6 may or may not be interesting since everyone wants to see the top 5, assuming they are the most interesting items and everything else is up for grabs as to importance. I mean really now... does anyone care at all that #50 is which finger I use to pick my nose? Whatcha think? Ok, now I am ready, I think.

100: I am ambidexterous. I can use both hands to do everything except write. I have to use my left hand to write, everything else is up for grabs. Some things I can do right handed, other things left handed. I know what you're thinking, if #100 is this cool, what could the rest be like?

99: I am an ordained minister. Y'all are freaking out right now huh? Laugh! Actually 4 or 5 years ago I went to this website Become a Minister Online and became a minister within 2 minutes and more importantly it was free and you even get to print out a certificate of ordination. The interesting thing about this is that it is legal. I am presently specializing in female confessions. So if you are female and want to repent and confess your wicked sins... you got my email address! Laugh And "no, mom and dad, I'm still Catholic, I didn't have to give up anything to join" However, I am considering donating $35.00 to the that website to become an official Archbishop!

98. Wow, this is harder than I thought... I should have put more thought into this list. Y'all will have to come back for the other 3 items... maybe tomorrow... Sorry.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Are you going to run to that website and become an ordained minister now? If you do, you must come back here and tell us. Are you right handed, left handed or ambidexterous. Oh, and girls, which hand... ummm nevermind.

Really Strange Department

I just realized that when I go into my bathroom and the light is ON... why do I put my hand on the light switch to turn it on every single time? Is this normal? Should I be worried? Dammit, that could have been #54

08 March 2005

No Rest For The Weary


Y

ou would think that after celebrating yesterday's event of seeing my 10,000th visitor pass through I would have taken today off... but not me... I'm right back at it. How ironic on the day I write about how boring Mondays are as far as writing great blog-stories, someone pops in as the 10,000th visitor. As a matter of fact it was the highest day so far with 282 people coming through the doors. ....

1 more doughnut please?

I know, I know... it's been pointed out that I shouldn't care about statistics... but I thrive on stats. Yes, I admit it, I'm a stato-holic. I wonder if there are organizations like, Statoholics Anonymous. I can already see Amanda banging her head on her desk.

I have a spreadsheet in Excel on my blog that would make my bank green with envy. Yesterday as I said there were 282 people here, today I want 283. I'm like that with a lot of things... just one more... I've got 2 ex-wives... just one more... hell, at this point I'll accept even a pretend one, 2 homes... just one more maybe, 2 computers... 2 is never enough... Amanda get in from that window ledge right now! 3 phones... hmmm maybe the kitchen needs one, 45 links to other blogs... maybe add 1 more, 5 kids... ummm I better draw the line somewhere.

Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Is anyone else out there similar to me? Are you compulsive about anything? What are you having for dinner tonight?

Extra! Extra!

Got 9:18 minutes to spare? The following link makes me sorry I threw out my etch-a-sketch. Check this out: Etching Be patient, relax and watch the entire presentation. Amazing...

07 March 2005

10,000th Visitor!!


L

et it be forever known that: At approximately 5:34PM, on this date, 7 March 2005, Monday evening... My Anything But A Normal Life entertained my 10,000th visitor!!! I am over-whelmed. I have so many people to thank, I don't know where to begin... first, there is the doctor that delivered me... It's a shame that that lucky person probably didn't even know it was he or she that clicked over to that magic number!! I should start planning for the next milestone... 15,000?
!...


...

Closed on Mondays


S

hould we ban blogging on Mondays? It seems for some reason I have nothing to say on Monday. Ever notice that my articles are pretty lame on Monday, as opposed to also being lame the other 6 days in the week?

In an effort to perk things up a bit today, Monday, at right is a fully nude photo taken of me against my wishes. However, since I am single again, it may help in attracting females. Many women have indicated that bald heads turn them on... notice that shimmering head gleaming in the sunlight. And that butt, man could you bounce nickels off that butt.

I think Monday is the international day of being closed... my favorite Chinese restaurant is closed on Monday... I never buy anything from them on Tuesdays either, because everything is left over from Sunday. Ever notice the dog and cat population seems pretty thin on Monday?... My dentist is closed on Monday... My favorite Mexican restaurant... closed on Monday. Traffic is even much lighter on Monday. I can never get an appointment with my doctor on Monday.... I don't know why he takes Monday off because it's so hot in Houston, the golf and driving ranges only open at night when the sun goes down. How hot is it in Houston? Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?" or The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground... or Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.

I Was So Bored

I took the Dante's Inferno Test and here are my results:
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished me to the Second Level of Hell!
Here is how I matched up against all the levels, however I am complaining to the management. I do not like the group I have been assigned to spend eternity with:

LevelScore
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)High
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)Low
Level 2 (Lustful)Very High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)Moderate
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)Very Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)Moderate
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)Moderate
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)Low


You have come to a place mute of all light, where the wind bellows as the sea does in a tempest. This is the realm where the lustful spend eternity. Here, sinners are blown around endlessly by the unforgiving winds of unquenchable desire as punishment for their transgressions. The infernal hurricane that never rests hurtles the spirits onward in its rapine, whirling them round, and smiting, it molests them. You have betrayed reason at the behest of your appetite for pleasure, and so here you are doomed to remain. Cleopatra and Helen of Troy are two that share in your fate. Hmmmm... well it might not be that bad on second thought...
Burning Questions and Random Thoughts

Ok, here are my questions for this boring Monday... Has it become obvious yet that I am just rambling and have nothing worth saying yet? Have you even gotten this far yet or are you still oogling my picture? And I know exactly what some of you are thinking... does he have any pictures of him laying on his back in the sun? Heh, I know how you girls think.

Take the Dante Inferno Hell Test If you take this test you must come back here and tell us what level of hell you'll be spending your eternity. I want to know who is my bunk buddy and who I have to share a water bottle with.