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30 September 2005

Stupid, Stupid Commercials ...


o you have a commercial on TV that bugs you? I hate commercials that don't tell the entire story.

Lately there is one that comes on and I think the same thing everytime I see it. It's for some car. The guys kisses his wife goodbye at the door, walks to the end of his property and jumps off the mountaintop.

On his way down he pulls a ripcord and a parachute opens. He lands on the canyon floor, brushes himself off and walks over to his waiting car and then drives off to work.

You know the one? Now here's my question... after work how does he get home?

Observations and Questions
Please tell me I am not the only one to think about this? Laugh. Do you have a favorite commercial? Is there one you just hate?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1942, Frankie Lymon NYC, rocker (& Teenagers-Why do Fools Fall in Love). Buried deep in the death notices we have in 1955, James Dean killed in an auto collision near Cholame, Calif. He was 24.

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
29 September 2005

Wanted ...


ousekeeper. I took a look around my place last night and decided I either needed a Maid or pep pills. I discovered the following things wrong:

Dining Room: Piece of Stueben sitting on my dining room table that belongs in the china cabinet. I unpacked this from my "Escape the Hurricane" aborted tries. Been there since last Friday.

Living Room: Last nights dinner plate, etc. sitting on the coffee table. Assorted CD's over by the player scattered on the floor. Assorted, unread magazines on coffee table.

Bedroom: Clean laundry on floor from washday, last week, waiting to be folded. Vacuum cleaner sitting, plugged into the wall and ready for action. Spare bed pillow alongside the bed, on floor naked without a pillowcase. Bed made? hahahahahahaha

Office: Bottle of Kaboom Shower, Tub and Tile Cleaner on desk and I don't know why. Can of Planters Honey Roasted Peanuts. Elmer's Glue, assorted papers thrown all over the deak. Shoes, dungaree shorts and shirt on floor. Old monitor on floor. 2 empty picture frames on floor. Sneaks. Dirt Devil unplugged. A napkin stuck under the TV and ontop of VCR. Shrug. New laptop, plugged in and ready to go. Bag for laptop on floor. Empty laptop box sitting on floor. Pictures of old trip to Belize scattered on desk. Assorted mail: opened and not opened.

Kitchen: Sink filled with dishes, dishwasher filled with clean dishes. I don't understand why I can't simply empty the dishwasher when it's done washing.

Bathroom Oh please... I don't even want to look in there.

I am a neat person, honest. But junk has taken over my life and the worse thing is that I don't care. Now I know you're sitting there saying, "geez, that's not so bad" and that's the point, it's not that bad and I'm still not cleaning it up, putting it on shelves, folding it, putting it where it belongs or throwing it away. There it sits... waiting, staring me in the face. Defying me. Seriously, if I ever hired a cleaning girl, I'd have to run around and clean up before she got here. I'd be mortified.

Observations and Questions
Are you like this? I guess single people can get away with it more than married people.

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1935, Jerry Lee Lewis, singer (Great Balls of Fire, Breathless). Leading the pack in the death notices we find in 1970, Edward Everett Horton, actor/narrator, (Bulwinkle Show), dies at 84

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
28 September 2005

I Got Email From A ...


scort Service yesterday. It was a very nice email telling me that April had visited my blog here and she thought it was very exciting AND she wanted to link to it, if I linked back to her blog. She even provided her blog address for me to check her blog out. GASP!

Interesting to say the least. There were also links to other Escort Services. I started checking them out. Yes, I'm a perv. LOL... The more I checked the more amazed I was... especially with the ummmm rates.

For Manhatten (2 hour minimum): $900.
Dinner Date Package: $1200.
Dinner Date and Show: $1500.
Day Package: $1700 - $3000.

Travel Rate (more than 30 minutes outside of NYC): $1200. - $3000.

Travel Rate within the US: 1 Day Overnight: $3000. - $6000.
3 Days: $10,000. and for 7 Days: $20,000. These rates did not include Travel Expenses.

Maybe I need to get out into the blog world more often but there were hundreds of these blogs out there. I was absolutely amazed. First of all who could possibly afford these rates? That is why I have decided to start my own escort service! I've been looking for a little sideline and this is too good to be true. My rates are as follows:

For Houston only: 1 Hour minimum: At my age an hour is tops: $25.00
Dinner Date: And I get a free dinner also?? $30.00
Dinner Date and Show: Does it get any better than this: Free!
Note: Females only... sorry guys but I'm not that deparate yet.

Observations and Questions
I can't think of one single question to ask about this. Say whatever you want. LOL

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1934 Brigitte Bardot, Paris France, sex kitten (And God Created Women) and in the death notices we find in 1978 Pope John Paul I, 65-yr-old found dead, after only 33 days as Pope. I still don't believe he died of natural causes.

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
27 September 2005

Conversation With My Daughters...


hen I picked up my two daughters yesterday to go to the movies... the conversation we had was the very last thing I ever thought we would be having. First of all, they were off yesterday and today due to the hurricane.

Anyway, the 10 minute ride to the movie seemed to turn into an eternity. We were riding along and the girls, O, age 8 and N, age 6, were talking in the back seat and I really wasn't paying much attention.... until, they got me involved... And it went like this:

N: I think it goes back up.
O: No, it falls off

N: The doctor lifts the baby up and looks under the legs to see.
O: No they don't. They put the baby on a machine and the machine tells the
nurse if it's a boy or girl.

O: Then if it's a boy, after awhile, it just falls off.
N: No I don't think so... I think it goes back up and stays up.

At this point I thought to myself, Please God, please don't get me involved in this conversation... I'll do anything for you.

O: Dad? when a boy baby is born, what happens to its' 'thing'?
N: Yeah Dad, its' pee-pee thing?
M: Ummm... it doesn't fall off and it doesn't go back up.

O & N: What? It stays there?
M: Yes. I wonder if we'll get to the movie before it starts.

O: Does that mean boys always have a thing?
M: (Breaking out in a sweat): Yes, boys always have a thing

N: So do you have a thing?
M: (God, why, WHY do you constantly do these things to me?
It's not funny) Yes, I have a thing.

O and N: You do??? (Quiet shock.)

End of conversation. I can almost imagine the conversation at the next recess in school.

Observations and Questions
Soooooooooo.... you parents out there... any comments? And for singles... how did you find out boys were different than girls?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1926, Jayne Meadows, born in Wu Chang China, aka Mrs Steve Allen. And in the death notices we have in 1965, Harry Reser, orchestra leader (Sammy Kaye Show), dies at 69.

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
26 September 2005

Where Do I Even Begin?


irst and foremost I have to say I am tickled to be sitting here writing this blog today. Just a short few days ago I wasn't sure where I would be, hour to hour. I decided on Wednesday morning to flee the city. Stupid me thought 610 to I-10 West towards San Antonio would be my best route. I gathered everything I could, put furniture up on my bed, table on the sofa, chairs on the dining room table, every free space in my place was occupied with something.

I headed out with less than a half tank of gas. I knew I passed 5 or 6 gas stations before I got on the freeway... I didn't think they would be closed and out of gas, but they were. Undaunted, I continued... I got onto 610, no problem, no problem that is until I got to the Galleria area.... dead stop. I still wasn't worried. An hour later when I hadn't gone 50 feet, I was a little concerned... an hour after that I had gone a total of a mile. It was around this time that I thought I MIGHT be headed for trouble! At this point I was in the 3rd lane over away from the exiting lanes. I just knew I was gonna piss people off when I started going to the right to get into the exit lanes, but I figured they would really be pissed if I ran out of gas right in front of them. After 15 minutes trying, I managed to get off 610. I sat waiting for the light to change and wondered what to do. I turned around and went home. I was going to wait out the storm there. Unpacked the car, put furniture back in its' place, and went to sleep.

I watched TV with all the traffic reports... thousands of cars stranded and millions of people trying to get out of the city. This was going to be bad I thought. Thursday morning came and I figured maybe I should try again... after all, the millions of people left the day before... Right? Wrong. It was worse, actually I think the cars I left on 610 were still there... I gave up again and went home. I kept thinking, what the hell am I going to do? Inbetween these two adventures I was getting calls from friends and family all over the country, worried about me. I told them I was fine and nothing was going to happen. I was convinced the hurricane gods would protect me. Actually, I was trying to convince myself.

Friday morning came and goofy me decided one more try. I went a different route with I-10 and San Antonio still in my mind. Before I knew it I was on I-10 sailing along at 60 MPH. Wow! This was great, I guess everyone that was going to get out got out. Tooling along the highway, I turned the radio on... singing, tapping my feet to the beat... not a care in the world.

Until I got 20 miles out of Houston.

Where the hell did all these people come from??? There were hundreds thousands of cars and people all over the place. Did I make a wrong turn and end up in the parking lot of Giants Stadium? A dejected looking guy was sitting on the side of the road. I got out of my car and walked over and asked the dumbest question I ever thought. "What's the holdup?" He looked at me and probably thought, "Now that's the dumbest question I ever heard." Anyway, he told me the cars were backed up for 30 miles, and he's been sitting there for over an hour and that's all he knew. Well, that's all I need to hear. I made a U-Turn on the median grass and headed back to Houston. I kept telling myself that God wanted me to stay in Houston for some reason and it was His fault I couldn't leave.

Back home I once again put everything back in its' place and decided I wasn't moving it anymore. My intentions were to stay up and greet Rita... I promptly fell asleep at 10PM...

I woke up with a start about 2AM... Rita had arrived... Rain and wind... rain and wind... I knelt up in my bed and pulled the blinds up on the windows behind and above the headboard. I tried to open the window but couldn't. What the hell is wrong with this thing I kept thinking... then I unlocked it and viola! the window opened. Laugh. Yes, Rita had arrived.... I ran to the front living room and looked out the blinds... wind, rain... trees blowing all over... Turned the TV on to the local news. I just knew at any minute that Braes Bayou was going to overflow and flood my complex. The Bayou runs alongside the apartment complex.

It would storm for a half hour, then die down for awhile... repeat, repeat, repeat. This lasted until about 7AM I think. Then she went as fast as she came.

Observations and Questions
Anything you want to say is fine with me! Laugh.

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1774, John Chapman, (Johnny Appleseed), frontier nurseryman. And in 1820, Daniel Boone frontiersman, dies in Missouri at 85.

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
24 September 2005

Weathering It Out...


he winds have picked up again and it sounds terrible outside. I thought it was over, but then it kicked up again. I've been spending a lot of time running to the front windows looking out, running to the back windows looking out, and in bed with the covers over my head. Laugh....

I want to thank everyone who have left messages... I just can't go and answer them all, but just want to log on real quick and let everyone know that everything seems to be ok here... now I have to go around and take all the stuff down that I put up for safety.

After the horrid evacuation of 2 million people in Texas, I can't even imagine them all trying to come back... Now I am soooooooooooo glad my 4 tries at evacuating didn't work out.

23 September 2005

Still Here...


am so dedicated to my blog I am staying here, braving the hurricane just to make sure my blog is nice and fresh for you....

Yeah, right. Had I continued yesterday, instead of turning around... I would be one of the motorists you're reading about who had run out of gas and now clogging the highways. It is a total mess here... There are thousands of cars out of gas, broken down or people just tired of stop and start driving... some of these people have been driving for 24 hours. It's unbelievable... The major problem is all of the "road improvements" with torn up highways being repaved, barricades, re-routing, etc. At one point late last night cars decided on their own to cut over onto southbounds lanes and take it upon themselves to make those lanes northbound... and quite frankly they did what the state was failing to do.

The city has gas trucks out filling up cars that are out of gas, even though the news channel are saying they haven't seen any of these "magical" gas trucks. Shrug.

22 September 2005

Guess Where I Am?...


f you said Houston, you win. I left the apartment early this morning and thought I would head to College Station, Texas... I got on 610 and headed towards the 270 entrance which should have taken me directly to my destination.

There were so many cars that it took me 3 hours to go 10 miles.

Cars all over the place... out of gas, small fender benders... it was terrible. I knew if I didn't do something I would be out of gas as well. After an hour of trying I finally got off the freeway... and I headed back home.

I'll look at tomorrow's weather and maybe the greatest flux of evacuees were leaving yesterday and today. We'll see...

21 September 2005

Kelly! Voodoo Fest! and Rita!...


hat's a guy to do? What's a guy blogger to blog about? Two girls and voodoo... kinda all seems like it belong together, don't it?

First: Kelly. I managed to break away from my busy schedule last night to watch Kelly Monaco dance her butt of in the special addition of Dancing with the Stars. As y'all know, I have a kinda/sorta attraction for Kelly Monaco. After the competition was over, people called in to vote. The thing that made me laugh was that you could only vote 5 times! 5 times? Where are we in Philadelphia where on election day where the dead always vote 5 times minimum? I voted 5 times Kelly, please marry me? Today's musical selection is also to commerorate her first dance last night. Kelly, the answer to the question is YES! laugh

Second: Voodoo. Once again Texas has stepped up to the plate. We've invited and they accepted to hold the annual Voodoo event right in Austin this year since they cannot hold it in NOLA this year. For those not in the know, the Voodoo Fest is not a bunch of naked women dancing around a fire with little dolls and pins stuck in them. Nope it's a music festival hosting some of the biggest names around.

Third: Rita: No, not THAT Rita, but Hurricane Rita now bearing down on poor Galveston and then coming straight up to Houston! I called my 2 daughters and they are taking off with my ex-wife to Dallas. My ex has an aunt that lives there. Hmmm, I never knew about this aunt. Her parents are going to Boston where her brother lives. Everyone is getting out of Dodge. Me? Dunno yet. Stay tuned for my "travels on the road to safety" in the coming days.

I just know Kelly Monaco will hear about the hurricane and call me to come stay with her.

Observations and Questions
If you had to evacuate due to impending danger, where would you go? For the life of me I couldn't figure out what Watticism Day was... I looked and looked... finally I found it: In 1983, Secretary of the Interior, James Watt slandered minorities in a speech before the U.S. Chamber of Commerce when he said that his committee had "a black, a woman, 2 Jews, and a cripple." I didn't think ANY politician was THAT stupid. Laugh

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1947, Stephen King, author. And in the death notices we have in 1961, Earle Dickson inventor of the Band-Aid, dies at 68. Thank you Earle!!

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
20 September 2005



hat a day! And it's hardy over yet...

I guess you noticed that I hadn't responded to any of the comments yesterday... I have an excuse, honest. My computer crashed, kinda/sorta, and is STILL acting like it has a mind of it's own.

My first indication was the machine wouldn't turn on... I'd hit the button and it was getting hung up on the opening screen. Shut it off, started it again... It went a bit further and got to the opening screen, then nothing. I had cursor action but no Start button. I waited and waited, it never came on. Shut it off and re-started... nothing... For some reason I thought it was my monitor. So to make a really long story, short... I went an bought a new mega-screen monitor. Hooked it up and turned on the machine. Viola! Everything worked fine and I even got to answer a posting or two here, then mid-post everything froze.

Off and on went the machine... nothing... So I figured maybe I need a new computer, so off I went and bought a new one. Hooked it all up, and I get nothing. The new one won't even give me a splash screen. I could feel my blood pressure rising. I am getting really pissed now. I unhook everything and go back to the old computer... still acting up.

Fast forward to this morning about 4AM... I turn on the old machine, just for laughs... nothing. I hook up the new computer and put it side by side with the old one. I try using a combo and plug different things into each computer... nada... Disconnect the new computer, give the old one a try... viola! Here I am, and I don't know why.

I'm not going to be around today as I am going to spend the next few hours copying important files from this machine to a CD... then take the new computer back and go to a different store to look for a new new computer, different brand and see what happens. So if I don't answer your messages on Halscan you'll know why.

Observations and Questions
I have nothing to say... talk amongst yourselves but come back and who knows where I'll be or if I've resolved my problems.

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
In 357 BC, Alexander III the Great, King of Macedonia and Emperor. Death notices include in 1973, Jim Croce singer/songwriter (Time In A Bottle, Bad Bad Leroy Brown), dies in a plane crash at 30.

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
19 September 2005

Would You Like a Left...


ender with those movie tickets, ma'am? Do you remember last Fridays' posting about a former girlfriend, Rita? Well, here is another little gem from those carefree days...

Do you remember the first time you borrowed your dad's car to go out? Wow, the first time you were actually driving alone... how cool is that? These are the times that you remember forever... and in this case, it's a nightmare to remember... well, for Rita, my girlfriend at the time, that is...

Remember from last weeks' article when I had my father's 1964 Ford Country Squire? Well, Rita had just passed her driving test and was legal to drive... according to the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania anyway...

It had to be a Friday or Saturday night, I don't remember which now, but we decided to go to the Tacony-Palmyra Drive-In on Route 73 in Palmyra, New Jersey, which was right across the bridge from Taconey in Philly. All the other bridges going from Philly to Jersey charged 50 cents, while the good old Taconey charged a nickle!

It was a big night for Rita... so excited. I drove to her house, with memories of that first bloody date locked forever in my bad memory department of my brain. I was acting like I had a psychological compulsive disorder by constantly checking the mirror for toilet paper and razor cuts.

I arrived and parked my dad's car, very carefully. Me personally... I was such a good driver, except for that one night when I ran into a parked car at the end of my street... and scared the hell out of the driver and his passenger who were undressed in the back seat. That's another whole story. Anyways...

I knocked on the door and went in and everyone exchanged pleasant "hello's" In came Rita looking every bit of beautiful as she ever looked. Out the door and off we went. Neither of us with a care in the world in our hearts. What a night it was going to be... just the to of us in her car, parked in the back row of the drive-in. Life didn't get much better.

We turned into the drive way of the movie... we could see the huge outdoor movie screen looming ahead of us. Slowing down we carefully approached the little square toll-booth looking building. Rita was a very careful new driver... she wanted this landing to be picture perfect... "Honey, do you think I am too far away from the ticket window?" she asked. "Dunno" I replied as my mind was somewhere off in dreamland thinking about how dark the back row was going to be. I felt Rita turning the car ever so slowly to the left to get closer to the man looking out of the window in the little toll-booth ticket office.... then it happened: C R A S H My brain raced back to reality. Rita was stunned, the ticket man appeared completely stupified.

Rita happened to turn the wheel a tad too hard and crashed right into the ticket booth. Bricks and cement were flying everywhere. Holy crap!

She needed a lot of comforting after the ordeal. After exchanging paperwork, etc., we did get into the movie for free that night. Her car actually only had a little dent in the fender, amazing since she took out the corner of the ticket booth. Once in the back row, I comforted her as much s possible. And I swear to this day I don't know how her head got stuck between the arm rest and her seat... LOL

Observations and Questions
As a teenager did you have any minor traffic accidents while borrowing your dad's car?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
18 September 2005

Comments and Changes...


re a comin' to the morning newspaper, The Not So Normal News.

I'm not sure what all yet, but here's a few to get me started this morning...

You know how I usually have graphics with an article? Well, I think that may be slowing things down a tad, especially with all the other graphics. GONE.

Some have mentioned problems wih Haloscan. It's happened to me a few times as well... What I do if I see it's going to hang up, close it down and then re-click and it opens up just fine. Try it next time and see what happens and let me know.

I think Saturday and Sunday will become Travelogue days. The main article on Saturday and if needed, Part II on Sunday. Then if you really want and enjoy them you can simply scroll down and read them on Monday. Shrug again, we'll have to see how this works.

Music I like the music, and I am pretty sure that's not a neogotiable item.

Observations and Questions
Comments? About anything? anyone?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
65 years old??? Born in 1940, Frankie Avalon, Philadelphia, actor and singer. 65??? And in our dark and dank death notices we find at age 27 in 1970, Jimi Hendrix, rock guitarist, dies in London.

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
17 September 2005

What To Do...


hat to do.... Weekday blog items versus weekend blog items. Yes folks, the battle rages on over here at the Not So Normal News. Even though we I only have one employee here, which is me... the battle goes on every weekend and I'm tired of it. I've come to a decision, maybe... but I need want am begging for your input. We have 2 types of bloggers... those that work and blog from work but not at home. Then there are the diehards, that would blog in their sleep if they could, and I honestly think there are a few of you out there.

There is a significant drop in readership on the weekends. So now that presents a problem for me on how to proceed... do I continue to write a new, fresh article everyday of the week, including Saturday or Sunday, or as some of you have done simply abandon the blog on the weekends and start over on Monday morning? Readers who visit blogs but don't care to create a blog themselves may not understand this problem, but readers who do blog understand it only too well.

One of my major problems is that when I write my blog 7 days a week, am I wasting 2 blog articles on Saturday and Sunday? I could actually use those 2 articles during the week when I am scratching my head for ideas.

1. Continue blogging 7 days a week, with new writings every Saturday and Sunday? Even though most don't read them until Monday in work...

2. Stop writing altogether on the weekend? and take a break?

3. Start putting my travel adventures on the weekends? Write an article and just leave it for both days? That way on Monday people that are interested in my travelogues can simply go back and read them?

4. Repost some of my more interesting postings from the past? It doesn't matter if you think they are interesting or not, it's my blog.

Observations and Questions
Since I asked a bunch of questions above there's no need for a question here... except, how horny do you get on the weekends? Hornier on the weekends or weekdays?

Holy Crap Department
I just did something that I have never done before! Usually when I come across a music selection for the day's blog, I listen to it before putting it on here. So, I started listening, sat back in my chair, feet up on the desk and promptly fell asleep while listening to the music for today I FELL ASLEEP in my chair! Laugh... is it THAT boring?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born today in 1271, Wenceslas II, King of Bohemia & Poland. And in the death notices on this date, 1989, Jay Stewart, announcer on Let's Make a Deal, commits suicide. Geez Jay, the show wasn't THAT bad.

Art Gallery Notice!
Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!
16 September 2005

Ever Have That Feeling...


hat there is something just not right? I sat last night on my sofa watching TV and thought to myself: Dear God, please give me a decent blog idea for tomorrow and I'll do (insert any worthwhile cause) as thanks. Within seconds a mental image appeared in my mind. It wasn't a pretty image either. Ever have that feeling that people are laughing at you? or just staring at you? I am going way back in my history for this one and people were both staring and laughing at me...

I was going on a "first date" with a co-worker of mine. We worked for the same supermarket... she was beautiful... an inch taller than I was, gorgeous shoulder-length blonde hair, and it was real. I was actually stunned that she agreed to go out with me. Geez, talk about nervous. I did the usual showered, shaved, etc. Got the keys to my father's '64 Ford Country Squire Station Wagon even.

I think we were going out for dinner, I don't remember now, but that's not the important part of this night. It was not only our first date but the first time I was going to also meet her parents for the first time. Every guys' major nightmare.

I got to the house and began walking up the endless front steps that went on forever, to her porch.... I think there were 4 steps. I took a deep breath, then knocked. Within seconds her father answered the door... very tall... heck Rita was an inch over me and I'm 5'11". "Hi Mr. Hendricks, I'm Denny and I'm taking Rita on a date tonight." He looked at me strangely and said to come in...

Mr. Hendricks was a photographer by trade and there was a newly married couple in the living room going over the proofs of their wedding. He introduced me and I sat down. The couple seemed to stare at me for what seemed like a really long time... an unusual amount of time actually. Geez, I couldn't wait to get the hell out of there. Rita came walking down the living room stairs looking absolutely gorgeous. She looked at me and I could see her stifling a laugh which she managed to contain to a nice smile. What the hell is wrong with these people?

Fast forward to my car after exiting the house. We get inside and Rita begins laughing her ass off... she's practically crying she's laughing so hard... Frustrated I said, "ok, what the hell is wrong with all you people?" Rita was laughing and crying so much she couldn't speak... she could only point. She motioned to the rear-view mirror on the car: I looked.... I was horrified. She laughed even harder and since we hadn't moved the car yet, she said for me to excuse her that she had to run back in the house to pee really bad.

Apparently I had cut myself in a zillion places while shaving... back then it was very common to take little pieces of toilet paper and place the torn pieces on the cuts... with the paper absorbing the blood. You usually left the toilet paper on for awhile and then could remove it after the cut had somewhat stopped bleeding.

Can you guess what I forgot to do in all my excitement? Yes Denny, you're an idiot. I forgot to remove all of the toilet paper from my face before I left the house. Where the hell were my parents? brother or sister? Didn't anyone care to look at me when I left the house? There were little nicks right up to horrible gashes... all covered in blood-soaked toilet paper all over my face...

I think this was the first time I realized that I was living in An Anything But A Normal Life.

Observations and Questions
Have you ever done anything so stupid while dating?

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1924, Lauren Bacall, Staten Island, actress (Dark Passage, Key Largo) and in the warm, cuddly death notices we find in 1498, Tomas de Torquemada, Inquisitor General, who burned 10,000 people during the famous Inquisition.

Art Gallery Notice

Come on! Come on! Wait are you waiting for? You know you wanna do it!

15 September 2005

So Many Blog Ideas...


nfortunately, none of them are in my head. I woke up this morning at 2:30AM... made my coffee and logged on all full of vim and vigor. There was a small idea and I began chanting: "Squeeze it out! Squeeze it out! WWWAAAYYYY out!" Ugh... nothing... I sat and stared at my blank blogger screen for a few minutes. It was gone... that great blog idea... gone.

So, I did the next best thing... I searched the web... for some ideas... that I could steal... I searched and searched. Well, here it is 4:36AM and guess what... now I am writing about writing nothing. I don't know why this happens. I'm an intelligent person, my head is full of things... well, again unfortunately, I probably can't write about half the stuff. I'd lose my PG rating... I wonder if I could attract more people with my R rated thoughts though?

I read this mornings headlines looking for something interesting to write about: "Suicide kills nine in Irag", Hurricane Ophelia pummels North Carolina", "Delta and Northwest file Chapter 11", "Catholic probe to look at gays in Seminary" Geez, already I know I'm in trouble here... The last item makes me laugh. Being Catholic myself I realized that it wouldn't take a bunch of Catholic investigators from the Vatican to figure this out. This panel will be visiting 229 seminaries to see if there is any homosexuality going on... oh give me a break. I can just see it now at dinner, "ok, tomorrow the Vatican panel is arriving, please act straight"

Two questions make me laugh that will be asked:

"Is there evidence of homosexuality in the seminary? (This question must be answered)." The second question asks whether faculty members "watch out for signs of particular friendships," the newspaper said. The Vatican ruling on whether homosexuals should be barred from the priesthood will be announced at a future date. And they just have tons and tons of straight guys and females just tripping over each other to get in, right?

When I was 9 or 10ish, I wanted to be a priest... honest. See proof in picture on right. I only got as far as altar boy. Then when I became a teenager and discovered girls had boobs, I re-evaluated my life.

Let's move on shall we... I could get excommunicated if I continue. I knew I shouldn't have looked at the newspaper this morning.

This next item cheered me up...

A local headline this morning says: "Evacuees Get Incentives to Move Out of Shelters" The displaced people from the hurricane regions are being ummm "bribed" to move out. They are being offered everything from the mattress they have slept on while a guest in Houston to extra cards for food and clothing. By the way one store at Houston's premiere shopping mall, The Galleria, reported that one evacuee was there and purchased a $250.00 bracelet on the emergency food and clothing card. I am so glad my tax dollars are being so well spent.

Morning Prayers
Dear God... please forgive me once again. I was only trying to be humorous in my writings above. Kinda just like when I was in politics and use to pray every night that you would smite the Democrats. And by the way, I know all priests and nuns are not gay... just some. Thanks for understanding, From Little Denny Shane.

Observations and Questions
Anyone have anything to say out there? PUH-lease!!

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1890, Dame Agatha Christie, mystery writer (Murder on the Orient Express). And in our death notices we find in 1983, Willie Bobo jazz drummer, dies at 49.

14 September 2005

It's True, I Brake For..


emeteries. Old, new, ancient... the cities of the dead are very interesting and I haven't seen one that I didn't like. If I'm in a city where I haven't been before and I spot an interesting looking cemetery, I'll always pop in to take a peek. When I lived in Philly, I was even on the board of trustees for a cemetery and wrote a book about it.

The Kensington Burial Grounds founded in 1732 and is the oldest, still active cemetery in the entire United States...

One of the really neat things about this cemetery is years ago they discovered that the soil in one part of the cemetery was unique and different from the rest of the cemetery... they asked permission to dig up a grave and examine the remains.

When they did, they were shocked. The body was of a soldier... civil war I think. Because of this soil, his body was preserved... uniform, perfect... buttons, perfect... Pretty neat.

To be buried at Palmer you must be a resident of an area in Philly called Fishtown. And believe it or not, it's free. The only thing you pay for is the opening of the grave. Unbelievable.

My grandmother, two uncles and a cousin are there... and one of the readers of this blog, Barb has relatives including her grandfather.

It's an amazing place and has been on some TV shows and in a few movies when they needed a creepy cemetery.

(Geez,I have to stop here for a minute. It's taken me probably 45 minutes to try and get these tombstone pictures lined up. Now I'm sorry I even started this article. Laugh)


Over on the right, we have one of the first tombstones I took a picture of, and that being William Bonney... better known as Billy the Kid. This picture was taken while I was driving through New Mexico many years ago and I came across the Old Fort Sumner Cemetery in DeBaco County.

The next one down is Buddy Holly in the City of Lubbock Cemetery, in Lubbock, Texas. For some reason I kinda knew this one would be small and modest. I think it fitted his personality.

Doesn't the next one seem to befit Howard Hughes? This is an old cemetery and not in a nice neighborhood of Houston. The Glenwood Cemetery is an old, seen better days type cemetery in Houston.

What a huge disappointment was Bela Lugosi's. I'm not sure what I was expecting to see... maybe an elaborate, gothic mausoleum or something... in actuality he died pretty much penniless.

Another one of my favorites in Baltimore, MD is Edgar Allen Poe. Baltimore claims him but we all know he lived and resided in Philly while he wrote some of his best stories. Everytime I go home to Philly I always stop by his house at 3rd and Spring Garden and go inside.

Then finally we have the "law west of the Pecos" himself... Judge Roy Bean. His bar/court room still stands today in Langtry even though the honorable judge is buried in Del Rio, Texas...

Observations and Questions
Am I glad this article is over with... it only took me an hour and a half to do it, over and over and over. So seen any famous dead people and their final resting place? Do you like cemeteries?

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1908, Clayton Moore, Chicago Ill, actor, the one and only true Lone Ranger. And in the tragic death notices we have, former Philadelphian and cheese steak lover, Grace Kelly, Princess of Monaco, dies at 52 in a car crash in 1982.

Let's Go People!

Come on now... you have been thinking about sending me a picture for the wall, right? What are you waiting for?

12 September 2005

Travelogue Monday! Rome... Part II

My Short-Lived Excursion Into The Tombs of the Popes


r "Excuse me sir, take another step and I'll throw this spear at you." Ah yes, this was the Vatican, home of spiritualism, prayer, adoration, and ugly Swiss Guards with long spears.

First, a little bit of history

The history of the relics of the Apostles Peter and Paul is one which is involved in considerable confusion. There is no doubt where the bodies now are - in the tombs of the Vatican and the Ostian Way respectively - but there is another tomb at the Catacombs of Saint Sebastian which also claims the honor of having at one time received them. One of the assumptions on what really happened is as follows (but is viable for dispute as with all other cool theories :P ) - There would have been no difficulty in obtaining the bodies of the Apostles after their martyrdom. The bereaved Christians seem to have followed their usual custom in burying both as near as possible to the scene of their sufferings. Each was laid in ground that belonged to Christian proprietors, by the side of well-known roads leading out of the city; St. Paul on the Via Ostiana and St. Peter on the Via Cornelia. In each case the actual tomb seems to have been an underground vault, approached from the road by a descending staircase, and the body reposed in a sarcophagus of stone in the centre of this vault. These tombs were the objects of pilgrimage during the ages of persecution, and it will be found recorded in the Acts of several of the martyrs that they were seized while praying at the tombs of the Apostles. For two centuries the relics were safe enough in these tombs, public though they were, for the respect entertained by the Romans for any place where the dead were buried preserved them from any danger of sacrilege

In the year 258, however, this protection was withdrawn. Christians from henceforth were specially exempted from the privilege which they had previously enjoyed on account of the use they had made of it to enable them to carry on religious worship. Hence it became necessary to remove the sacred relics of the two great Apostles in order to preserve them from possible outrage. They were removed secretly by night and hidden in the Catacombs of Saint Sebastian, though, probably the fact of their removal was known to very few, and the great body of Roman Christians believed them still to rest in their original tombs. At a later date, when the persecution was less acute, they were brought back again to the Vatican and the Via Ostiana respectively. When the Church was once more at peace under Constantine the Great, Christians worked towards preparing the places so long hallowed as the resting places of the relics of the Apostles into the sites of great basilicas. The emperor himself not only supplied the funds for these buildings, but actually assisted in the work of building with his own hands. At St. Paul's, where the tomb had remained in its original condition of a simple vault, no difficulty presented itself, and the high altar was erected over the vault. The inscription, dating from this period, "Paulo Apostolo Martyri", may still be seen in its place under the altar. At St. Peter's, however, the matter was complicated by the fact that Pope Anacletus, in the first century, had built an upper chamber above the vault. Even to the present time, in spite of the rebuilding of the church, the actual vault itself in which the body lies is no longer accessible and has not been so since the ninth century. There are those, however, who think that it would not be impossible to find the entrance and to reopen it once more, but, so far, without result.

My Adventure Begins

Now, I ask you... after reading all of that, wouldn't YOU want to go down those stairs and see the reilics? I thought so... me too. I stood at the top of the stairs and read the sign: "Nessun Entrata Ha Permesso" Now how was I supposed to know that the sign read "No Entrance Permitted"? They should have had it in English like they do today.

Anyway I looked around and only saw one Swiss Guard and his back was turned towards me. Why would the Vatican think a sign would deter me? Especially since the only guard was turned away from me?

Down the stairs, I descended very quietly, tip-toeing, so my feet wouldn't make a sound in the immense echo-chamber. I was simply in awe. Marble stairs, marble walls, marble ceilings... slivers of gold and silver appropriately decorating the walls, floors, ceiling, nooks and crannies... all over the place.

Good Lord these guys are buried in style and all I'm getting is dirt. Once at the bottom and my feet planted on marble floors again... I looked to the left down a long marble and gold hallway with what appeared to be grottos on each side... I looked to the right, another long hallway with grottos off to each side... and the in front of me... the hallway was darkened and an iron gate protecting it from the prohibited masses, like me I suppose... it also had a lock on it.

I hesitated a second too long.

I was just about to go straight ahead into the darkened hallway towards the gold locked gate when I heard behind me somewhere: "Fermata! Il signore, la fermata! Nessun'entrata!"

Are you guessing what I am guessing? Yes out of nowhere came the Invisible Flying Swiss Guard... holding his massive spear with a REALLY big pointed tip... I had to decide immediately... should I run down the hall, snapping pictures as I run and take the chance of being speared right there in front of dead popes? The fact that the guard positioned himself in back of me now, close enough to feel the slight pressure guiding me back up the stairs...

I made my decision and began the long walk back up the marbeled stairs... no pictures, no fond memories... nothing. Somehow going back up, I lost that warm, fuzzy and HOLY feeling that I had when I was heading down the same steps. So ended my brief excursion into the tombs of the Popes.

"il dolore me e", yes, "woe is me" indeed.

Several years afterwhich I learned that the tombs were opened to the public. and stayed opened for a brief time. Then Vatican officials announced that the tomb of St Peter would be closed to visitors for the foreseeable future because of damage caused by humidity. Visitors had been able to peer through a gilded grille to the mosaic and bronze floor that lies over the tomb, with groups of 15 at a time entering the necropolis beneath. But Vatican officials say that not even selected visitors such as scholars will be allowed into the tombs in future because of the danger of damage through humidity, damp, saline encrustations and microbiological phenomena.

Observations and Questions
First, I need to apologise... I lied... I knew what the sign had said... but that is no excuse. Apparently after some years of work, it is now re-opened again... I need to go back and attend to some unfinished business.

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1913, Jesse Owens, Olympic track star, spoiled Hitler's 1936 Olympics with 4 gold. And in the death notices, one of my favorite growing up cowboys, 1972 William Boyd, cowboy, (Hopalong Cassidy), dies at 77.

Gentle Reminder of the Day

C'mon now, get yours in before I run out of room!

11 September 2005

United States Attacked

Total Deaths
Total Injured 2,337

New York World Trade Center

Total Deaths 2,792
Total Injured 2,261
Firefighter Deaths 343
Police Deaths 75

American Airlines Flight 11
WTC North Tower 92

United Airlines Flight 175
WTC South Tower 65

The Pentagon - Flight77-Flight 93

Total Deaths The Pentagon 124
Total Injured The Pentagon 76
American Airlines Flight 77
The Pentagon 64

United Airlines Flight 93
Shanksville, PA 40

10 September 2005

Welcome to..


aturday... I think Saturday will be devoted from now on to cleanups and quickies. Cleanups being last minute comments on the previous weeks' postings and Quickies for real quick notes on whatever. I decided to do this mainly because I have nothing else to say on Saturday mornings... and I have to say something or you guys might start reading that other newspaper.

Ok, so let's see what we have here...

Cleanup: Katrina: FEMA gets a new boss... I'm not sure if Brown was doing a good job or incompetent. I'm sure the position is over-whelming. The new guy sure doesn't seem like he's gonna take any crap from anyone.

Quickie: The Butler Didn't Do It... Ok gang, I need y'all to do something before you leave this page. See the book on the left over there? Click on it, go to our literary site and sign up... it's free, doesn't cost a nickle. I am getting paranoid that no one is taking advantage of the services.

Cleanup: I got side-tracked last week because of the holiday so therefore this Monday will be Travelogue day again and I'll finish my story on my extremely short-lived visit to the tombs of the Pope's in the vaults below the main floor in the Vatican.

Quickie: Remember Richard Hatch from the first season of Survivor? Seems he could possibly be headed for ummm the shower room of a nearby prison. Seems old Dick (no pun intended) (who am I kidding, yes it was) was indicted Thursday on 10 charges, including his failure to pay taxes on the $1 million prize he received for his victory on the first season of the reality series.
Other charges faced by the Rhode Island native include filing a false tax return, wire fraud, bank fraud and mail fraud. If Hatch is found guilty on all 10 charges, he could face 75 years behind bars and millions of dollars in fines. Yes, I can just see all the guys on the happy farm lined up to meet Richard.

Cleanup: Did I miss anything that you can think of? If I did, use the comments to mention it and I will try and clean it up.

Quickie: Do you enjoy keeping up with the latest fashions? If so visit Raquel's blog to see what's next.

Observations and Questions
So... Any plans for the weekend? You know, you can talk about anything you want... you don't always have to see what I am asking... lol

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1945, Jose Feliciano, Lares PR, singer/songwriter (Light my Fire) and reaching down deep into the dusty death notices we find in 1961, Leo Carrillo, actor who portrayed Pancho on Cisco Kid, dies at 81.

Gentle Reminder of the Day

Many thanks to Deni Bonet for sending in her picture! And Deni, good luck and have fun on your 3 week vacation to Egypt! C'mon now, get yours in before I run out of room!

09 September 2005

Only in America..


an we spend upwards of 80 billion dollars... let me rephrase that... EIGHTY BILLION DOLLARS... that's "illion" with a capital "B" $80,000,000,000.00 Did I miss a zero there? I could sit here and say it in a dozen foreign languages and it all comes out the same: "bullshit". I really would love to see, exactly, what 80 billion dollars has bought for the victims of Katrina. This does not include the million dollars a pop that some stars have donated...

I watched the news last night and while showing scenes of the different stars at the Astrodome, looking pathetic for the TV cameras and handing over checks for a million, they interviewed one elderly black woman. The reporter asked her "wasn't it nice of "so and so" to come down and donate a million? did you get to meet them?"

The elderly woman looked at the reporter and said, "I don't need to go shake their hands... what I need is a home for my grandchildren." Now, keep that scene in your mind.

I flip over to Dr. Phil. He's talking to a black fella that has been looking for his wife and 4 kids since the day the hurricane hit. He's hoping they are alive but he doesn't know. Dr. Phil goes through the usual "what would you tell them if they were here right now?" What a dumb-ass damn question. Anyway, the guy tells them he loves them, etc. And with that they walk out on stage and the man nearly collapses. To make a long story short, we in Houston have a guy who runs a furniture store and by all accounts is extremely wealthy. He donates to this family a paid in full condominium, he also buys the family a brand new car... AND gives the guy a job in his furniture store. Don't get me wrong, I am all for helping people... my mind flashed back to the elderly grandmom hoping she can find a house for her grandchildren... not for HER mind you... but for her grandchildren.

Another news clip: "I lost hundreds of my friends in Biloxi alone and nothing ain't going to bring them back to me," said a tearful Virginia McGown as she prepared to go to bed on her front lawn.

As I was down around the Astrodome complex yesterday, I saw a woman walking up the street towards another friend. This woman was waving a card in her hand, walking away from the Astrodome. She was waving it, doing a little jig as she walked and laughing. I had two thoughts... I'm glad she got help... 2nd thought: why do I have this feeling she just scammed the system and actually lives right here in Houston?

Now we have whites arguing against blacks and visa versa that the whole relief effort is racially motivated... we have movie stars handing out money like candy on Halloween, but only when the camera crew is all prepared and lights are on... the Republicans and the Democrats are starting to throw mud and pointing fingers... the Governor of Louisianna and the Mayor of New Orleans pointing fingers at everyone but themselves... All of these people finger-pointing has me wondering just why do I have only 5 on each hand and they have a gadzillion?

EIGHTY BILLION FUCKING DOLLARS..... All this while we have one of our countries major cities sittin' in ruins... I wish I were sittin' on the dock of the bay right now.

Observations and Questions
Anyone want to join me on the dock in that bay?

Please God, I Need a Joke Today Department

The famous Olympic skier Picabo Street (pronounced
Peek-A-Boo) is not just an athlete....she is now a nurse
currently working at the Intensive Care Unit of a large
metropolitan hospital. She is not permitted to answer the
hospital telephones. It caused too much confusion when she
would answer the phone and say:

Picabo, ICU.

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1941, Otis Redding, Georgia, rocker, (Sitting on the Dock of the Bay) and another birthday is our old friend Captain Bligh, born in 1754, somewhere, He was the nasty ship's captain of the HMS Bounty. And in our death notices we have 2 world figures: In 1087, William I The Conqueror, King of England, & Duke of Normandy and on the other side of the world in 1976, Mao Tse-Tung Chinese communist party chairman (1949-76), dies at 82.

Gentle Reminder of the Day

Many thanks to Deni Bonet for sending in her picture! And Deni, good luck and have fun on your 3 week vacation to Egypt! C'mon now, get yours in before I run out of room!

08 September 2005

Equal Time..


kay, since yesterday's blog was all about bad luck, I thought I would give equal time to Good Luck... to even things out.

Good Luck: Fingers Crossed - By making the sign of the Christian faith with our fingers, evil spirits would be prevented from destroying our chances of good fortune.

Good Luck: Knock on Wood - It was believed that good spirits lived in trees, and that by knocking on anything made from wood, we could call upon these spirits for protection against misfortune.

Good Luck: Saying God Bless You When Somebody Sneezes. When the great plague swept Europe., sufferers began sneezing violently which was a sign of death. The Pope therefore passed a law requiring people to bless the sneezer. At the same time, it was expected that anybody sneezing would cover their mouth with a cloth or their hand. This was obviously to stop the spreading of the disease, but many believed that it was to keep the soul intact. Sneezing 'into the air' would allow the soul to escape and death would be imminent. Up until this time, the opposite was true. Those who sneezed were congratulated, as it was believed that a violent sneeze would expel evil from their bodies.

Good Luck: Reading the Not So Normal News naked 7 times a day. (This one really works!)

Good Luck: A robin flying into the house

Good Luck: Sneezing 3 times before breakfast

Good Luck: Meeting 3 sheep

Good Luck: Looking at the new moon over your right shoulder

Good Luck: A 4-leaf clover

Good Luck: Spilling wine while proposing a toast

Good Luck: Putting a dress on inside out

Good Luck: 9 peas in a pea pod

Good Luck: Hearing crickets singing

Good Luck: Picking up a pin

Good Luck: Dropping a glove

Good Luck: A horseshoe

Good Luck: Peacock feathers

Good Luck: Cutting your hair during a storm

Good Luck: Sleeping facing south

Good Luck: White heather

Good Luck: Picking up a pencil in the street

Good Luck: Breaking clear and uncolored glass

Good Luck: Walking in the rain

Good Luck: Sleeping on un-ironed sheets (I must be filled with all kinds of good luck then)

Good Luck: Avoiding cracks in the sidewalk

Good Luck: An itch on the top of your head

Good Luck: Scissors hanging an a hook

Good Luck: A ladybug on you

Good Luck: Carrying an acorn on your person will ensure good luck & longevity!

Good Luck: To find a four-leaf clover means immense good luck, so keep it safe, if you lose it

Good Luck: To pick up a piece of coal that has fallen in your path.

Good Luck : To have one's garments caught up by a bush or briar when out walking is a promise of good luck, involving monetary gain.

Good Luck: New enterprises will be fortunate if begun at the time of the new moon.

Good Luck: If by chance you meet the same person twice when you are out on business. It is even luckier if you encounter him once when you are setting out and again when you are returning.
Good Luck: Dolphins swimming nearby a ship

Good Luck: A naked woman on board a boat is said to calm the seas. (Honest, I'm not making these up)

Good Luck: Golfers can have a successful day on the course if they start their round with odd numbered clubs and don't use balls with numbers higher than 4

Good Luck: To set out for golfing on a rainy day

See a penny, heads up, pick it up; all day long you will have good luck.

Observations and Questions
Yes, you know the question already... do you do anything for good luck? Does it work?

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1841, Anton Dvorak, Nelahozeves, Czech, composer, (New World Symphony) and another musician in our ancient death notices... In 1991, Alex North, music composer (Spartacus), dies at 80 of cancer.

Gentle Reminder of the Day

C'mon now, get yours in before I run out of room!

07 September 2005



re you superstitious? Never walk under a ladder? Don't get out of bed on Friday the 13th? The thought occured to me last night that while some of us are superstitious... do you know how some of these even came into being? Me either... until now. The only thing more appropriate would be if this was Friday the 13th...

In North America the number thirteen is considered to be the unluckiest of numbers. Hotel and high-rise owners often avoid numbering the thirteenth floor as such because of dread the number thirteen holds for so many people. Indeed, Friday the thirteenth is considered a particularly unlucky day. The roots of this phenomenon can be traced back to the Last Supper, at which Judas, Christ's betrayer, is considered to have been the thirteenth guest at the table. It is also commonly held that the crucifixion of Christ took place on a Friday, and this, coupled with our mistrust of the number itself, increases the fear associated with Friday the thirteenth. .

The fear of black cats came about because the Goddess Bast of ancient Egypt was a black cat. When Christianity began to take over, priests wanted to wipe out all other religions, thus teaching that black cats are evil,

The broken mirror superstition originates from ancient Rome, when the reflection in a mirror was said to be the person's soul. Disrupting the reflection (i.e. breaking it) meant having bad luck for the next seven years.

April Fools' Day began in the 1500s when the Gregorian calendar took over from the Julian. Those who forgot the change and attempted to celebrate New Year's (previously celebrated on the 1st of April) on the wrong date were teased as "April fools."

Ever walk under a ladder? A leaning ladder forms a triangle with the wall and ground. Triangles represent the Holy Trinity, and violating the Trinity by breaking it (walking through it) would put you in league with the devil himself.

And some quickies:

Bad Luck: 3 butterflies together

Bad Luck: A 5-leaf clover

Bad Luck: Breaking a glass while proposing a toast

Bad Luck: Putting a shirt on inside out

Bad Luck: Cutting your nails on a Friday

Bad Luck: Putting a hat on a bed

Bad Luck: Getting out of bed left foot first

Bad Luck: A picture falling

Bad Luck: Breaking a mirror

Bad Luck: Opening an umbrella indoors

Bad Luck: Giving away a wedding present

Bad Luck: Stepping on cracks in the sidewalk

Bad Luck: An itch inside your nose

Bad Luck: You must wear new clothes at Easter or you will have bad luck

Bad Luck: Breaking a mirror means 7 years of bad luck, unless you take the pieces outside & bury them in moonlight. Also, an undisturbed mirror in a house suddenly fall & smashes then it means that there will soon be a death.

Bad Luck: Unless you were born in October, the wearing of an Opal will be ill-fated

Bad Luck: Sparrows are said to carry the souls of the deceased to the after-life. To kill one means that you will be cursed.

Bad Luck: It is extremely unlucky to open an umbrella inside a house.

Bad Luck: If a groom drops the ring during the ceremony then the marriage is doomed to failure.

Bad Luck: Breaking a plate, especially if it had not already been cracked.

Bad Luck: To upset pepper

Bad Luck: Never mend a garment while you are wearing it, or misfortune will follow.

Bad Luck: It brings ill fortune if a lease or any contract is signed in the months of April, July, or November.

Bad Luck: To spill ink threatens worry, annoyance, and the failure of a project that is on foot.

Bad Luck: To encounter a gravedigger coming towards you. Usually this means there will be a severe illness.

Bad Luck: If you fasten a button into the wrong buttonhole

Bad Luck: if a candle falls over

Bad Luck: Throwing stones into the sea cause bad luck

Bad Luck: Starting a cruise on a Friday

Bad Luck: Stepping on board a ship with your left foot

Bad Luck: It is unlucky to sit on a table unless one foot is touching the ground

Bad Luck: To pass anyone on the staircase.

Bad Luck: To put on the left shoe before the right, and it is worse still to put the right shoe on the left foot, or vice versa.

Observations and Questions
Are you superstitious? About anything? Any good luck charms?

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1922, Art Ferrante, pianist. And peeking into the dusty death notices we find in 1971, Spring Byington, actress (Lily Ruskin-December Bride), dies at 84.

Gentle Reminder of the Day

Thanks to Lois Lane for sending her picture for our wall. Great pic Lois!! C'mon now, get yours in before I run out of room!

06 September 2005

Summer's Gone..


s a kid, one of my least favorite holidays, if not the most hated, was always Labor Day. Why? Ask any school aged kid... it marks the end of summer. Those carefree days of fun, the Jersey shore, and just generally goofing off. If it was Labor Day, then school started next week in Philly. Ugh.

Here in this picture we see little Denny Shane praying before going to bed. Little Denny is praying for a good year in school... no, no now... I didn't say a productive, good grades type year. At this age there were more important things on my mind. What horrible nun I was going to have... would I see my same friends from last year? What cute girls were starting to wear a bra? And would I have a girlfriend this year?

I even devised a cute little trick to find out which girl was wearing a bra. I'd ask the girl if she wanted to see a neat trick... when she said "yes" I put my thumb at the base of her back and ran it all the way up to her neck... if I hit a "speed bump" along the way, then she had definitely matured over the summer. Yes, I know... your thinking how pathetic. But not nearly as pathetic as the next story:

I was walking into the school-yard and one of the cutest girls in my class, Cassie F. came up to me and asked if I wanted to read a joke. I said, "sure"... she handed me a piece of paper to read, and then she said: "you're gonna shit yourself" I thought, "OMG... she said 'shit'" I don't remember what the joke was now, all I knew then was that Cassie F. went right to the top of my "fun girls" list. See, I told ya... pathetic.

Speaking of what nun I was getting... I prayed every night that it wouldn't be Sister D... I'm not typing the rest of her name in case she's out there reading my blog. She should be about 108 years old now, but I know she's out there looking for me.

Back then, all the guys in the know... KNEW that when a girl went into the convent, she had to have her breasts removed. Yes, sad but true, that's what we simpletons thought. And Sister D was proof. She had -A cups... nothing... zilch... she just confirmed what we already believed. They had their breasts cut off and there were 2 bandaids on each area where they use to be.

Is it no wonder I see a psychiatrist at the VA hospital once a month? This Dr. thinks I make this stuff up. She's lucky I haven't gotten to the good stuff yet. LOL

Ah yes, school days at Nativity School... good times, good memories... hey! any girls wanna see a neat trick?

Observations and Questions
Got any school days memories that you can share? Oh come on, you gotta have at least one...

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1947, Jane Curtin, Cambridge Mass, actress (SNL, Allie Lowell-Kate & Allie) and in the dusty death notices we find in 1901, President William McKinley, assassinated by Leon Czologosz in Buffalo, NY.

Gentle Reminder of the Day

Thanks to Lois Lane for sending her picture for our wall. Great pic Lois!! C'mon now, get yours in before I run out of room!

05 September 2005

Happy Labor Day..


hether or not you are working today or if you happen to be from a country that doesn't recognize the holiday... Happy Labor Day! We appreciate you!

In honor of this holiday we've given everyone off at the Not So Normal News...

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born today in 1847 Jesse James, Missouri, outlaw. And our death notices on this Labor Day include in 1969 Mitchell Ayres, orchestra leader, (Hollywood Palace), dies at 58.

Gentle Reminder of the Day

NOW is the time to send me your picture so I can hang it on the wall!!

04 September 2005

I'm Not Here Today...


ecause, I'm taking care of business.

Have a great day and see y'all tomorrow!

Observations and Questions
Any plans for today or tomorrow?

Gentle Reminder of the Day

NOW is the time to send me your picture so I can hang it on the wall!!

03 September 2005

Accidentally Erased..

Accidentally Erased...
02 September 2005

There's Always a..


ownside to everything... and hurricane Katrina is no exception. Ragtag armies of the desperate and hungry begged for help, corpses rotted along flooded sidewalks and bands of armed thugs thwarted fitful rescue efforts as Americans watched the Big Easy dissolve before their eyes.

I watch the news coverage of New Orleans and am stupified. The damage from mother nature is over-whelming and unbelievable. I do not blame some of the people for trying to get food and in their time of crisis a store window is broken into for food products for themselves or their families.

I watched as a reporter interviewed a guy about the aftermath and his needs. The guy went on to say how his family needed food and he justified breaking into supermarkets to get food for the children and babies. As he spoke, the camera slowly panned out until we saw a 19 inch TV set in his hands. These are the exact people that the Governor claimed would be shot on site. "These troops are battle-tested. They have M-16s and are locked and loaded," Louisiana Gov. Kathleen Blanco said on Thursday night. I thought, "Wow, about time." I guess it was all talk as I watched people in a convenience store stealing cases of beer while 2 uniformed guardsman stood and watched.

Enter Houston, Texas... From the Superdome to the Astrodome. The Mayor of Houston, Bill White stated that none of the nonsense from New Orleans would be tolerated. I guess my definition of that statement is a far cry from what the mayor meant. The refugees haven't been in Houston 24 hours yet and already they are walking around in the neighborhoods knocking on doors asking for food. I live about 15 minutes from the Astrodome... so far no one has knocked on my door.

If only these refugees would follow orders at the Astrodome, go to the bathroom IN the bathrooms and not on the corridor floors, people might even take them more seriously and sympathetic... Yes, I know they are in most dire straights, but they are being helped... why can't they see this? The bathrooms at the Astrodome could handle crowds of 40,000 during Astro games using the toilets... why not 10,000 refugees? Maybe I am too cynical as I get older... actually I think I have mellowed out as I get older.

Goddammit... I just knew, I was waiting... this morning on ABC's Good Morning America, they've shown black leaders now saying the rescue efforts are a black/white issue. They claim white people are being saved and black people are being ignored. Give me a fucking break! Just look at the Houston Astrodome... out of 10,000 people I haven't seen any white people there, except the volunteers and workers... everyone else is black. Do NOT turn this into a race thing... it's a human thing.

Observations and Questions
I am NOT anti-helping victims... far from it. Situations like this one really tends to bring out the good in people and the very worst in people. As of this writing we have spent almost 200 billion dollars in Iraq, building free homes, etc. Now is the time to bring back a few of those billions and rebuild the cities affected by this hurricane. Charity begins at home first!

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

Born in 1948, Sharon Christa Corrigan McAuliffe, teacher/astronaut (the ill-fated Challenger). And in the dusty death notices we have in 1547, Hernan Cortes, Spanish general defeated Aztec Indians.

Gentle Reminder of the Day

NOW is the time to send me your picture so I can hang it on the wall!!

01 September 2005

Not For Kids..


hat's right, if you have kids that read my blog then you better send them to the kitchen because today's article is all about sex... yes, SEX. It just wouldn't be a normal day if I didn't get at least 20 emails to improve my sex life. How do they know? How do they know I am in pathetic straights and need help?

Yesterday I received several emails... all related to my performance, etc. The first one was "penis enhancement" and was guaranteed to not only increase my erection but staying power also. However, there was a warning and if I take the pill and have an erection for more than 4 hours I should consult a Doctor. Are you kidding??? If I had an erection that lasted 4 hours, I'd be running up and down the street shouting: "Look, look! 5 hours and counting!!"

The next item on my in box list was "sperm increasing creme"... The ad told me that at my age, sperm has moved on to more fertile grounds but this creme could begin instantly provide for copius amounts. All that sperm and nowhere to go... Wheeee...

There was a solution for that as well... the next thing I needed was a "dating service" to show off all of my new abilities and of course there just happened to be several in the Houston area for my pleasure. These females are just waiting for me, and guess what??? They are all horny! Married, unmarried, all ages, eye color... Wow, did I hit the jackpot.

Now there are several options here. I could simply delete the emails or as it says on the bottom of the ads to opt out go to a particular web site and click on "unsubscribe" or "no more email". End of story? Not by a long shot...

Observations and Questions
Do you get these emails? What do you do? Ignore them and delete them or go to the website and unsubscribe? I was told if you go to the website, all you are doing is confirming that you have a good email address and then the ads just pour in.

Birth Announcements and Death Notices

In 1957, Gloria Estefan, Cuba, singer (Miami Sound Machine-Conga) and in the dusty death notices we find in 1914, Martha, the last known passenger pigeon, dies at Cincinnati Zoo.

Gentle Reminder of the Day

NOW is the time to send me your picture so I can hang it on the wall!!