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28 February 2006

EVER FEEL LIKE YOU'RE GONNA THROW UP?


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veryone has, right? Man, lemme tell ya... I woke up at 11 last night and ran to the bathroom... got there... and nothing. So I went back to sleep. At midnight, up again racing to the bathroom. Nothing. Took some TUMS and back into bed. At 1AM, guess what? Yep, up again and into the bathroom... zilch, nada, zero. I was so pissed. Pissed that I didn't throw up! LOL I thought back to what I may have eaten for dinner. I only had a bowl of Simply Asia Garlic Sesame Rice Noodle Soup. I doubt it could have been that. Maybe the 2 chocolate covered dougnuts for dessert? Nah, couldn't be...

Here it is now 5 AM and still nothing and my stomach feels like crap and so queasy... I'm thinking Exlax now. Unfortunately I don't have any on hand. Ugh, I don't feel like getting dressed and going to Walgreen's. I wonder if they would get mad if I called and asked if they delivered?

On another note... as y'all know I entered my Chicken and Egg painting over on Last Girl's blog. I didn't win as the Worst Art. The only reason I can think of as to why I didn't win was because my little painting isn't bad at all. It must be great, right? I am writing a letter with a copy of my painting enclosed to the Louvre in Paris. I think my Chicken and Egg would only stand to enhance any Picasso they may have hanging.

Well friends, that's all I can muster this morning. I'm off to... well, you know.

Observations and Questions
Any advice for my sick, sick tummy? And don't try to be funny by telling me I'm pregnant. That's impossible. I haven't had sex for 5 yea... wait, what is sex anyway?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1928, none other than the man himself, Smokey The Bear. And in the death notices we find in 1968, Frankie Lymon singer, dies at 25.
27 February 2006

WOW! LOOK AT ME!


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ell now. I really need to thank Dawn for finding this little exercise at My Heritage

It seems you can upload a picture of yourself and the program will search it's database and viola!! It will produce famous people that have the same facial features as you. Of course I did it. There popped up 9 or 10 faces that supposedly I look like, or they look like me.

Trust me folks, if I thought for a minute I looked like Mira Sorvino or Laura Brannigan... I'd never leave my bedroom! It would have mirrors on the walls, the floor and the ceiling.

For the life of me I cannot see any resemblance between me and any of the other people.















Harry BellafonteJacques SantersLaura BranniganMikis TheodorakusMira SorvinoPierre Curie


Observations and Questions
So do you look like anyone famous?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 280 ad Constantine the Great, Holy Roman emperor, (306-37), adopted Christianity. And in the dusty death notices we find in 2003, Fred[erick McFeely] Rogers [Mr. Rogers] children's television host, dies from stomach cancer at 74.
26 February 2006

SUNDAY COMICS


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now why today is important? Because it's only 14 days until my birthday! That's right gang, you only have a few days left to buy me a birthday present! Ladies, you already know what I want and guys... ummm y'all don't have to get me anything... really, no... that's ok.



SUNDAY JOKES


In Richardson, Texas State Trooper was running radar. He had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but wasn't getting any. Then he discovered the problem. A 12 year old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign which read "RADAR TRAP AHEAD!" The officer later found a young accomplice down the road with a sign reading, "TIPS" and a bucket full of money. (And we used to just sell lemonade!)

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A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar post in Plano, Texas. A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo of handcuffs.

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A young woman was pulled over in Austin, Texas for speeding. As the TX State Trooper walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book, she said, "I bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the Texas State Police Ball." He replied, "Texas State Troopers don't have balls." There was a moment of silence while she smiled and he realized what he'd just said. He then closed his book, got back in his patrol car and left. She was laughing too hard to start her car.

Observations and Questions
Any plans for today?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1928, Antoine "Fats" Domino New Orleans LA, rhythm & blues pianist/singer (Blueberry Hill). And in our death notices today we find in 1997, David Doyle, actor (Charlie's Angels), dies at 67.
25 February 2006

HAPPY SATURDAY! and GO VOTE!


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sually when I start off by saying "good morning" you already know I have nothing to write about. Huh? First, however, I want to thank everyone who voted for my Chicken and Egg painting over on Last Girl's blog, but I think I lost. It was pretty hot 'n heavy there for awhile but then a dark horse came out of nowhere and took the lead. I do however, believe there is a slim chance and you can go vote again, today at Last Girl on Earth for my really ugly 'Chicken and Egg' original oil painting.

Attention! Attention!

Please go to Last Girl's Blog and vote for me again. PLEASE! Due to some malfunction in the system, the counters had to be reset to 0 all over again. If you voted for me yesterday, please go back and vote for me today. Contest ends Sunday night!


However I did make 2 new friends who entered their own art. So in the end, I did win anyway. I met Jessica from Daughter of Opinion and Jane from The Laughing Frog Please go and say hiya to them and don't forget to tell them I sent ya! Who knows, maybe they'll leave me something in their Wills.

Plus the excercise gave me an idea... I'm in the process of scanning my paintings and making postcards out of them. That might be pretty cool.

Observations and Questions
Any plans for the weekend? Plus, this question just added at 6:57 CST: Am I the only person that thinks the potential of adding people on skiis being pulled by dogs on a snow trail should NOT be in the Olympics? They are actually thinking about this one. Where's the 'sport' in that?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Il Compleanno Felice, l'Enrico... Born this day in 1873, Enrico Caruso Naples Italy, operatic tenor. And in the death notices for today in 1983, Tennessee Williams, writer, (Streetcar Named Desire), chokes to death on a bottle cap at 71.
24 February 2006

IT'S VOTING DAY 2006


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s you remember, Deni Bonet aka Last Girl on Earth is running a contest over on her blog for the worst art. I did my part and entered my 'chicken and egg' original painting that I did about 25 years ago. Now it's time for you to stand up and be counted and go vote... for my painting of course. I think this is the venue I need to become a world-class artist. Imagine, my 'chicken and egg' hanging in the Louve someday.

I thank you and my poor, invalid, Aunt Olga who lives alone in the 'home' thanks you. She said to me just yesterday when I sent her a few pennies I saved to give to her for food... she said, "Denny me boy, the greatest wish I have in life now is that you win the contest and become famous." Now honestly folks, how could you disappoint poor Aunt Olga? I thank you, Aunt Olga thanks you, even her 18 cats, 2 dogs, 2 parakeets, 1 hamster thanks you. Vote for Chicken and Egg Painting.

OTHER IMPORTANT STUFF


I had a really good posting for today lined up, but then I went to bed and when I woke up at 4AM, I couldn't remember what it was... Anyway, I am still thinking about my contest here... As soon as I decide I'll post it right here!

Oh... this is neat. Remember awhile back the whole postcard thing with bloggers? You sent your address to a blogger and everyone sent postcards to each other? Believe it or not there is an actual website where you can submit your name and address... and then you can start sending and receiving postcards from all over the world. The website is Postcrossing - The Postcard Crossing Project If you need a hobby, this might be it. God knows I need something, so I signed up and have sent 6 so far around the world. Hey, if you want a homemade postcard from ME, just email me at denny609@sbcglobal.net with your name and address and I'll send ya one!

P.S. Please be assured that your name and address will remain private. It will not be sold or traded. Well, unless you are really hot and I can get $5 for it.


Observations and Questions
Today is open mic day. What's on your mind?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1946, Barry Bostwick, San Mateo CA, actor (Rocky Horror Picture Show). And in the death notices we find on this date in 1998, Henny Youngman, comedian (Take my wife please), dies at 92.
23 February 2006

AL GORE INVENTED THE INTERNET BUT I INVENTED THE JAWS OF LIFE: ANOTHER GREAT IDEA STOLEN


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onestly... we all know that ABC Nightly News regularly "lifts" stories for their Nightly News from my blog. I happened to be on the Peanut Queen's blog yesterday and I wrote a short story about the invention of the Jaws of Life. She suggested I share it with the world... So here it is in all of its' horror of how I once again contributed and someone stole my idea.

It was way back when I was about 5 or 6 years old. Monday started out like any otyher day... nice weather, the ice cream man riding around on his bike/cart selling cones and popcicles. Even the horseradish man was riding around in his truck and making fresh horseradish for folks. And yours truly was outside playing 'army' by myself which was normal because I didn't have many friends growing up... and in a minute you'll understand why no one was allowed to play with me.

Back then you had to use your imagination a lot. While playing army I decided I needed a helmet. The only thing I had was a metal sand bucket, the kind that kids would take to the beach because plastic buckets hadn't been invented yet.

I put the 'helmet' on my head and in order to get a snug fit, I pulled it down as far as I could and slipped the little metal handle under my chin. This created a slight problem that I didn't forsee... actually, I couldn't forsee anything. In the process I had pulled the bucket down over my eyes also... and having 'snugly' pulled the handle under my chin, I couldn't get it off either.

Now, imagine if you will... a 6 year old standing on the pavement... with a metal bucket pulled over his head and eyes... and crying. No matter how hard I struggled I couldn't get that damn handle from under my chin. I think by now my head was starting to swell from lack of oxygen or something. As I wandered around walking into telephone poles, parked cars... walking into dog poop... I was getting panicky... After what seemed like an eternity I swore I could hear the faint sound of a fire engine... racing to a fire. It was getting louder. And louder, until it seemed to be right next to me. It was...

Because the bucket was also over my ears, I could barely make out the fireman saying: "you know kid, you are a dumbass." They rummaged around for a bit in the tool box looking for pliers or anything that could help getting the bucket off my head. Later in life I realized how lucky I was that jackhammers hadn't been invented yet.

Finally, they found a pair of tin snips. Squeezing the tin snips between my cheek and the bucket handle they cut the handle. Pop! the bucket flew off my head. I could breathe.... I had been saved.

Years later I saw on the news about fireman using the Jaws of Life to get someone out of a smashed car. I was taken back to the bucket incident and it dawned on me. That fireman went home that night and invented the Jaws of Life. So indirectly I must be responsible for saving millions of lives all over the planet.

If everyone that has been saved by my invention would send me $5 in the mail... well you know...

Observations and Questions
Has anyone stolen your ideas and made a fortune?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1649, John Blow, composer of 1st English opera (Venus & Adonis). And in our death notices we have in 1965, Stan Laurel, comedian (Laurel & Hardy), dies in California of heart attack at 74.
22 February 2006

SAVE YOUR THUMBS NOW!


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humbs? And why do they need saving? Text messaging, once seen as a way to send a short message without running up the expense of a cell-phone call, has become so popular that it poses its own public-health problem: sore thumbs.

I know I usually write about some kind of dribble on here, but today's message is about your health. Tired of worrying about Iraq? The whole Port system fiasco? Then stop and worry about something much more personal... yes, your thumbs.

93 million text messages are sent every day in the U.K. One estimate for the United States, whose population is five times as large, is 700 million text messages a year. These have translated into a reported 3.8 million cases of "repetitive strain injuries per year" in Great Britain alone.

12 percent has admitted to sending up to 20 text messages a day. Ten percent said they sent more, up to 100 messages a day. That adds up.

So how come I don't get any?

Dr. Matthew Bennett of the British Chiropractic Association warns that when people lean over their tiny keypads typing intently, "the tendency is to keep your shoulders and upper arms tense. This cuts down the circulation to the forearm, when in fact it needs a greater than normal blood flow to achieve the consistent movements of the thumbs and fingers."

You can protect against repetitive stress injuries as they text:

If your forearms and hands start to hurt, stop.
Switch hands.
Make a call instead.
Don't always use the same fingers to type.
Take breaks. It's harmful to type on a BlackBerry or cell phone for more than a few minutes.
Do simple exercises, such as using your thumb to tap against each finger on that hand, and stretching your fingers, perhaps putting a rubber band around them for resistance.

Observations and Questions
I was going to write another piece on the port situation but decided to write about something more important today.

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1862, Connie Mack baseball manager (Philadelphia A's 1900-1950). And in the death notices today we find in 1998, Sandy Hume, correspondent (Fox News), commits suicide at 28.
21 February 2006

I THOUGHT I HAD DIED


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tupified was exactly what I was when I heard the story on ABC Nightly News last night. Aparently the contract for taking over the ports in the United States was awarded to... are you ready for this? Dubai Ports World, a state-owned business in the United Arab Emirates. This includes loading, unloading AND security.

We're talking Baltimore, Miami, New Jersey, New Orleans, New York and Philadelphia here. Talk about putting the fox in charge of the hen house. Can I remind someone that 2 of the 9/11 crackpots came from the UAE...

Republican Sen. Lindsay Graham of South Carolina said on Fox News Sunday that the administration approval was "unbelievably tone deaf politically." New York Gov. George Pataki and Maryland Gov. Robert Ehrlich are up in arms... Both governors indicated they may try to cancel lease arrangements at ports in their states because of the DP World takeover.

I also heard through the grapevine that up for consideration next is the Al "we'll clean your clocks and military bases" Quiada, Quaidi, Quadia, Quidi, Qaida, oh, however, the hell you spell it.

In the uneasy climate after the Sept 11 terrorist attacks, the Bush administration decision to allow the transaction is threatening to develop a major political headache for the White House.

A headache?? No shit!

Observations and Questions
I don't even know what to ask here...

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1931, Larry Hagman, TV actor, (I Dream of Jeannie, Dallas) And in the death notices we find in 1991, Dame Margot Fonteyn, ballerina, dies of cancer at 71.
20 February 2006

CLARICE, I COULD JUST EAT YOU...


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ow get your minds out of the gutter. This is not the opening line to some sleazy, X-rated movie... (shame) I was merely quoting the infamous Dr. Hannibal Lector. We all remember him from Silence of the Lambs, right? Sir Anthony Hopkins... what a performance. And of course Agent Starling... Clarice Starling played by the incomparable Jodie Foster.

I watched this movie again yesterday for the umteenth time. I don't know why but every time it's on TV, I have to watch it again. One of the things I really enjoyed this time was that AMC the movie channel showing it, gave interesting backgrounds during commercials. For instance... in one scene you see a pencil sketch Dr. Lector drew, of Clarice holding a lamb. In the background you see Il Duomo, the Cathedral in Milan I believe. Even though it's never brought out in the movie, the scene of the Duomo can only be seen from the Hotel Belvedere in Milan.

Why is this important? Because the killer they are after lives in Belvedere, Ohio. Lector was giving Starling a clue. The movie also won 5 Academy Awards in 1991 and ranking up there with only two other movies to achieve that ranking.

I have a quick question for you... assuming you've seen the movie. What is Sir Anthony Hopkin's total screen time in the movie? Meaning how many minutes does he actually appear in it.

A. 16 minutes
B. 32 minutes
C. 34 minutes
D. 44 minutes

WAIT! Those were wrong. Here's the times again:

A. 16 minutes
B. 17 minutes
C. 18 minutes
D. 18.5 minutes

Observations and Questions
Have you seen it?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1955, Kelsey Grammer, St Thomas Virgin Islands, actor (Fraiser Crane-Cheers/Fraiser). And in the death notices we find in 1985 Clarence Nash voice of Donald Duck, dies at 80 of leukemia, in California.

Newest Member of the Not So Normal Photo Gallery
Let's all welcome our newest inductee, Michelle aka Mutant Cat, to the Not So Normal Photo Gallery.
19 February 2006

THANK YOU FOR ALL THE IDEAS


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ow, once again you guys came through with your suggestions... all of them. I'm going to go through everyone of them and then decide. If anyone else comes up with anything different, just let us know. Just to let y'all know, I was never really considering a 'show us your butt' contest. I threw that in there knowing y'all would not go for it, but come up with your own ideas. However, if anyone feels the need to send me a pic of their naked butt, I won't turn it down! lol

IDEAS SUBMITTED SO FAR


Naked Butt Pictures
A Bad Poetry Contest
Blind Contour Contest
Bad Limericks
3 Different Gimmick Ideas
Worst Outfit... Worst Hair... Fashion Disaster
Weirdest Keyboard Search to find your blog
Worst self-made video
Best/Oddest Pet picture
Pets that look most like their master
Taping yourself throwing a Sickie Day excuse Seizure and having our bosses judge which one is most convincing?


SUNDAY JOKES


A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features.

However, if she is menstruating or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with scissors lodged in his temple and duct tape over his mouth while he is on fire.

No further studies are expected.

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One Monday morning a mailman is walking the neighborhood on his usual route. As he approaches one of the homes he noticed that both cars were in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by Bob, the homeowner, coming out with a load of empty beer and liquor bottles.

"Wow Bob, looks like you guys had one hell of a party last night," the mailman comments. Bob in obvious pain replies, "Actually we had it Saturday night. This is the first I have felt like moving since 4:00 am Sunday morning. We had about fifteen couples from around the neighborhood over for New Year's Cheer and it got a bit wild. Hell, we got so drunk around midnight that we started playing WHO AM I."

The mailman thinks a moment and says, "How do you play that?"

Well, all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with a sheet covering us and only our "privates" showing through a hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is."

The mailman laughs and says, "Damn, I'm sorry I missed that."

"Probably a good thing you did," Bob responds. "Your name came up four or five times."

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It was a foggy night in Seattle and a helicopter was lost in the city. Running low on fuel the pilot pulled up to a tall office building. Looking into the window he saw a man alone in his office and called out to him:

"Where am I?"

"You are in a helicopter" the man responded.

"Thank you." the pilot responded.

The pilot immediately rose above the building and took a left. Moments later he and his passengers were all safely on the ground. One of the passengers asked:

"How did that guy in the office possibly help you determine out location?"

"Well", replied the pilot, "His answer was 100% accurate and 100% useless. At that point I knew we were outside the Microsoft Help Desk and just took a left to the airport."


Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1955, Margaux Hemingway, Portland OR, actress (Lipstick). And in our death notices we find in 1985, Elizabeth Julesberg, author (Dick & Jane), dies.
18 February 2006

I AM NOT BENEATH GIMMICKS


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veryone has something going on within their blogs. Deni over at Last Girl has the ugly art contest, Michele has a deal where when you post on her blog you look at the name before you, go to that person's blog and leave a comment that Michele (thanks kenju) sent you. Now THAT is clever. Then of course we have the whole Half Naked Thursday deal going on. I sent in a picture of me half naked and they sent it back saying "stop being funny, this is a serious contest."

Ok folks... this is where you come into play. I need your ideas! That's right, I'm going to host a contest or something and YOU are going to supply me with the idea! Now how cool is that? Heck, I might even name the contest after you.

Ok lemme think now... I got it! How about butt of the week? Send in a picture of your unadorned, naked butt and I'll post it on here with no names. This way if you've ever wanted to expose your butt but didn't know how, this is the perfect opportunity! Anonyminity guaranteed! You can send your ex a picture of how you really feel about them! Or your boss? ex-mother in law? teacher? The possibilities are endless! This one has merit... I'd like to thank myself for coming up with the idea.

Observations and Questions
Ok guys, put on your thinking caps... what can you come up with? In the meantime, tell everyone that Denny Shane, that's http://djshane.blogspot.com/ sent you! lol

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1957, Vanna White [Rosich], North Myrtle Beach, SC, TV game show hostess (Wheel of Fortune). And rounding out our death notices we have in 2001, [Ralph] Dale Earnhardt, NASCAR driver/"The Intimidator", dies in crash during Daytona 500 at 49.
17 February 2006

ANOTHER CONTEST I MIGHT WIN...WITH YOUR HELP


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need your help. Yes, I am asking, begging, enticing, whatever word you choose. It seems that my friend Deni Bonet is having a contest on her blog. It is for the worst art hanging in your house. I have entered and your vote will count! I WANT TO WIN!!

The whole idea is to send her the worst artwork hanging in your house. I thought, "Denny, you have all really nice artwork by famous people hanging in your home. You can't enter." Then I saw this little gem of a picture hiding in the corner. I wondered if this fitted into the qualifications for the contest as 'bad art'?

I painted created this masterpiece about 25 years ago. It poses the age-old question; "which came first, the chicken or the egg?" I know, I know... it's hard to believe that it's not a Rembrandt or Monet, it came from little ol' me.

The whole purpose of this blog? You see, when Deni feels she has received enough pictures, she will put them all on her blog and visitors will vote on who has the most pathetic art. This is where you come in my faithful friends... Well being a retired politician I am not beneath stuffing the ballot box. Yes, this is your opportunity to take part in ballotbox stuffing! You must go vote for my chicken and egg. But not yet... I will tell you when... she's only collecting bad art right now... so when she's ready I'll give you the go ahead!

Observations and Questions
Truthfully, what are my chances to win? Do you have 'bad art'? What is it?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1941, Gene Pitney, Hartford CT, singer/songwriter (Town Without Pity). And in the dusty death notices we find in 1908, Geronimo, Apache chief, dies at about 79.
16 February 2006

HOV LANES AREN'T A PREGNANT GIRLS BEST FRIEND


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o you have an HOV lane where you live? These are specific lanes on the highway which MUST contain a minimum of at least 2 people in the car. Single cars are prohibited from using this lane. Here in Houston, the HOV lane is patroled quite often and the rules are strictly enforced.

Two different females tried to explain to the cop they were permitted to use the HOV lane since they were pregnant. It didn't work.

However, that does not deter drivers from coming up with all kinds of ways to circumvent the situation. Here are a few explanations and items that people have used in order to try and use the HOV lanes.

In January 2006, a driver was stopped and ticketed on U.S. 36 in Westminster, Colorado, for driving in a carpool lane with a mannequin he created by applying make-up to a wig stand and affixing it to clothing stuffed with newspapers (then strapping the finished product into the passenger seat with a seatbelt).

In November 2005, Kevin Morgan of Petaluma, California, was handed a $351 citation in Marinwood for driving in a carpool lane with a kickboxing dummy propped up in the passenger seat. The dummy was dressed in a baseball cap and Miami Dolphins windbreaker and wore a seatbelt.

In 2001, a policeman in Atlanta pulled over a carpool lane violator who'd positioned a dummy in the passenger seat. The mannequin in question was wearing a sports jacket, a pair of sunglasses, and a baseball hat. Best of all, he had been positioned so he was holding a newspaper.

Ruses motorists have used to conceal their driving alone in car-pool lanes:
Store mannequins, blow-up dolls, kickboxing dummies, cardboard cut-outs, and even balloons (with faces drawn on them in marking pen).

Other No- No's are:
Buckling the passenger-side seat belt and pretending to talk to someone reclining in that seat.

Covering an empty infant seat with a blanket or placing a doll in it.

Taping a styrofoam wig stand to the passenger headrest and topping it with a blonde wig.

Strapping the family pooch into the passenger seat.

And no, lone hearse drivers transporting clients to their final rests cannot use the HOV lane.

Observations and Questions
Would you or have you ever used the HOV lane illegaly?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1935 Sonny Bono, Detroit MI, singer (Sonny & Cher, Mayor-R-Palm Springs CA). And in our death notices we find in 1996 MacLean Stevenson actor (MASH), dies of heart attack at 66.
15 February 2006

ONE DOWN, ANOTHER COMING UP


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alentine's Day is gone for another year. Some people feel depressed because they didn't have a valentine this year, and some feel thrilled that they received something from someone special in their life. However, now that it's over let's get right down to business!

What am I talking about? I'm talking about the upcoming biggest holiday of the year... Saint Patrick's Day! Ok, ok, maybe not the biggest but close to it. Some of my best parties have been St. Patrick Day parties.

Ok, I admit there have been times when I've enjoyed Irish wakes a lot more, where the body is in the living room in repose and the mourners are all in the kitchen getting soused and singing Irish songs. Maybe someday I'll blog about the Irish wake I was attending and we were all arrested for drunkenness disorder and the local priest had to come and bail us out of jail so we could attend the funeral.

Anyway back to the subject matter... will you be celebrating this year? Do you just stay at home because your drinking days are long gone? The one day a year when everyone you meet is Irish. One year I met a girl named Chin from Pei-Ching, China who was dressed to the nines in her Irish best. I swear she looked more Irish than my own grandmother who came from County Down.

And no offense meant but there is no one more fun than a good old fashioned Irish Catholic girl out on the night on St. Patty's Day.... but that can be a whole 'nother article.

Observations and Questions
Do you observe St. Patty's Day?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 0037 none other than that ol' bar-b-quer himself, Claudius Drusus Germanicus Caesar Nero emperor of Rome. And in our death notices today we find in 1965 Nat King Cole, singer (Unforgettable, Mona Lisa), dies at 45.
14 February 2006

BE MY VALENTINE?


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es friends, today is Valentine's Day the world over. In that spirit, I decided to give you just a paragraph of the most famous love stories of all times. Some stories, in their entireties are quite powerful.

Antony and Cleopatra
One of the most famous women in history, Cleopatra VII was the brilliant and beautiful last Pharaoh of Egypt. Although she is often portrayed as a femme fatale, Cleopatra was deeply religious and studied to be a nun. An accomplished mathematician and gifted linguist fluent in nine languages, Cleopatra was also skilled politician popular with her people.


She married her younger brother, Ptolemy, and she became the mistress of the Roman general Julius Caesar. Following Caesar's death, Roman general Marc Antony went to Egypt to advance the growing power of Rome. Cleopatra captivated Antony. Their affair scandalized Roman society and bothered Roman politicians, who were suspicious of Egypt's power.

Yet despite the risks, Antony and Cleopatra married in 36 B.C. The couple planned to conquer Rome. But in 31 B.C. the Roman general Octavian destroyed the combined forces of Antony and Cleopatra in the battle of Actium. Hearing a false report that Cleopatra was dead, Antony fell on his sword. With no hope left, Cleopatra induced a poisonous asp to bite her.

Four thousand years of glorious Pharaonic rule was finally finished. Egypt became a Roman province. Octavian (later Augustus) became the first Roman Emperor, launching a new era in history.

Abelard and Heloise
The tragic story of Abelard and Heloise has resonated through the ages. Around 1100, Peter Abelard went to Paris to study at the school of Notre Dame. He gained a reputation as an outstanding philosopher.


Fulbert, the canon of Notre Dame, hired Abelard to tutor his niece, Heloise. Abelard and the scholarly Heloise fell deeply in love, conceived a child, and were secretly married. But Fulbert was furious, so Abelard sent Heloise to safety in a convent.

Thinking that he intended to abandon Heloise, Fulbert had his servants castrate Abelard while he slept. Abelard became a monk and devoted his life to learning. The heartbroken Heloise became a nun. Despite their separations and tribulations, Abelard and Heloise remained in love. Their poignant love letters were later published.


Shah Jahan and Mumtaz Mahal
In 1612, a teenage girl, Arjumand Banu, married 15-year-old Shah Jahan, ruler of the Mughal Empire. Renamed Mumtaz Mahal, she bore Shah Jahan 14 children and became his favorite wife. After Mumtaz died in 1629, the grieving emperor resolved to create a fitting monument.

It took 20,000 workers and 1,000 elephants nearly 20 years to complete this monument, the Taj Mahal.

Built of white marble, the Taj sits on a sandstone platform. A 137-foot high dome tops the mausoleum. The interior is lavishly decorated in lapis lazuli, turquoise, agate, jasper, and colored marble. The exterior is paved with semiprecious stones that sparkle in the sun. The surrounding garden contains four water channels representing the four rivers of Islamic paradise.

Shah Jahan was never able to complete a black marble mausoleum he planned for himself. Deposed by his son, Shah Jahan was imprisoned in the Red Fort of Agra, and spent lonely hours staring across the Jamuna River at the monument to his beloved queen. He was eventually buried beside her in the Taj Mahal.


Abigail and John Adams
Although she lived at a time when many women were not educated, Abigail Adams learned to read, developing an appreciation of current events. Her intellect attracted her to a young lawyer, John Adams, and they were married in 1764. It was an intellectual and romantic relationship that would last for more than 50 years.


The Revolutionary War and other events often forced Adams to be away from home for long periods of time, so they wrote each other long affectionate letters.

When she did join her husband, on diplomatic missions to Paris and London, and later in Washington, DC, Abigail was a valued partner, entertaining with style and observing people with interest.

In 1801 the Adamses left the White House and retired to their farm in Quincy, Massachusetts, where they remained in contented companionship, for the next 17 years.

Queen Victoria and Prince Albert
Victoria was a lively, cheerful girl, fond of drawing and painting. She ascended the throne of England in 1837 after the death of her uncle, King William IV. In 1840, she married her first cousin, Prince Albert of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha.


While at first Prince Albert was unpopular in some circles because he was German, he came to be admired for his honesty, diligence, and his devotion to his family. The couple had nine children. Victoria loved her husband deeply. She relied on his advice in matters of state, especially in diplomacy.

When Albert died in 1861, Victoria was devastated. She did not appear in public for three years. Her extended seclusion generated considerable public criticism. Several attempts were made on Victoria's life. However, under the influence of Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli, Victoria resumed public life, opening Parliament in 1866.

But Victoria never stopped mourning her beloved prince, wearing black until her death in 1901. During her reign, the longest in English history, Britain became a world power on which "the sun never set."

Robert and Elizabeth Browning My personal favorite!
Elizabeth Barrett Browning and her husband, Robert Browning, led lives suited for leading Romantic poets. Their story contains all the elements, a secret courtship, elopement, love poems, and the beautiful Italian landscape.


Writing poetry as a child, Elizabeth published a book, Poems, in 1844. The work impressed Browning, a poet himself, and he began a correspondence. The two later met and fell in love.

Opposition from Elizabeth's father forced them to elope in 1846. They later fled to Italy, where they lived and worked for 15 years. Much of their work was inspired by their own long romance, including Elizabeth's Sonnets from the Portuguese. After Elizabeth's death in 1861, Browning returned to England, where he continued to write until his own death in 1889.

Annie Oakley and Frank Butler
Annie Oakley (Phoebe Anne "Annie" Oakley Mozee) of Darke County, Ohio, was a tomboy from the start, and soon became known as a skilled rifle shot. In 1881, the famous Baughman and Butler shooting act was performing in Cincinnati. Star of the show, champion shot Frank E. Butler, boasted that he could beat any local marksman.


Butler was amused when told a young woman had accepted his challenge. But Phoebe Ann won the contest. She also captured Butler's heart. They were married in 1882.

Butler abandoned his career to manage hers. As "Annie Oakley" she joined Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show, performing into the 1920s.

Annie died in 1926. Her heartbroken husband died 18 days later. Their happy marriage had lasted 44 years. Irving Berlin immortalized this most American of love stories with his 1946 musical Annie Get Your Gun.

Observations and Questions
Which do you like the best? Or do you want to share your Valentine story with us?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1948, Raymond Joseph Teller Philadelphia PA, magician (Penn & Teller). And in our Valentine's Day death notes we find in 1996 Eva Hart, Titanic survivor, dies at 90.
13 February 2006

FORGET LOVE POTIONS... EVERYTHING YOU NEED IS AT YOUR GROCERS


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hat's right folks... every single thing you need to enhance your ailing love life is right at the local supermarket. As you know, I scour the earth for things to bring you. Valentine's Day is no different. Below are several items... what they are and what you can use them for and feed your loved one tomorrow.



1. Peas, capers and onions can save your marriage. (No, I don't think applying onions there will help anything)

2. Lime, fresh mint and sweet vermouth can induce sexual ecstasy. (Where exactly do you apply the lime?)

3. Cucumbers can help you get even with your ex. (I'm not sure how this one works, but I would be pissed if I knew I was replaced by a cucumber..)

4. Corn silk, olive oil, red wine and matches can help you attract the man/woman of your dreams. ( or at the least a pyro-maniac)

5. Carnations and a bubble bath can heal a heartbreak. (or at the very least give you wrinkled skin)

6. Three magical words can ensure that you find the right mate. ("Help! I'm desparate?")

Observations and Questions
Now when you use these items tomorrow, you must come back and tell us if they worked! Or if you have already used them... did they work?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1944, Jerry Springer, London England, talk show host (Jerry Springer Show). And in our death notices we quietly find in 1980, David Janssen [Meyer], actor (Fugitive), dies at 49.
12 February 2006

GOOD SUNDAY MORNING!


H

ere we are and gathered for another Sunday morning! Coffee? Juice?? I just had 2 bagels myself... one onion and one 'everything' along with a nice glass of tomato juice, with lots of pepper! Below are a few jokes I came across that I thought I would share with you today.


A new, young MD doing his residency in OB was quite embarrassed performing female pelvic exams. To cover his embarrassment he had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly. The middle-aged lady upon whom he was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassed him. He looked up from his work and sheepishly said, "I'm sorry. Was I tickling you?"

She replied, "No doctor, but the song you were whistling was, "I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Wiener"...

___

Three girls all worked in the same office with the same female boss. Each day, they noticed the boss left work early. One day the girls decided that, when the boss left, they would leave right behind her. After all, she never called or came back to work, so how would she know they went home early?

The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening,spent playtime with her son and went to bed early. The redhead was elated to be able to get in a quick workout at the spa before meeting a dinner date.

The blonde was happy to get home early and surprise her husband,but when she got to her bedroom, she heard a muffled noise from inside. Slowly and quietly, she cracked open the door and was mortified to see her husband in bed with her lady boss. Gently, she closed the door and crept out of her house.

The next day, at their coffee break, the brunette and redhead planned to leave early again and they asked the blonde if she was going to go with them.

"No way," the blonde exclaimed. "I almost got caught yesterday!"

___

The Seven Dwarfs go to the Vatican, and because they are "the seven dwarfs," they get ushered in to see the Pope. Dopey leads the pack.

"Dopey my son," says the Pope, "what can I do for you?" Dopey asks, "Excuse me, Your Excellency, but are there any dwarf nuns In Rome?" The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a moment And answers, "No Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Rome."

In the background a few of the dwarfs begin giggling. Dopey turns around and gives them a glare, silencing them. Dopey turns back to face the Pope. "Your Worship, are there any dwarf Nuns in all of Europe?"

The Pope, puzzled again, thinks for a moment and then answers, "No Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in all of Europe." This time all the other dwarfs burst into laughter.

Once again, Dopey turns around and silences them all with an angry glare.

Dopey turns back to the Pope and says, "Mr. Pope, are there ANY dwarf Nuns in the whole world?" The Pope answers, "I'm sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns anywhere In the world."

The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling, and laughing, pounding on the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks as they begin chanting:

"Dopey screwed a penguin!"

"Dopey screwed a penguin!"


Have a great Sunday!!

11 February 2006

NOTE TO ABC NEWS: NO! I AM NOT INTERESTED!


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ust in case they come to me begging and looking for a new anchor! If you have been following my blog for any amount of time you'll know that ABC has allegedly been reading my blog for things to report on their nightly news. So that tells me they must be very interested in my style.

Nope! Not gonna do it ABC! That's final! (maybe)


As you know, first my favorite news anchor, Peter Jennings died not long ago. ABC appointed Liz Vargas and her co-anchor Bob Woodruff to head up the Nightly News...

Then poor Bob was nearly killed in Iraq while covering a story. Get better soon Bob. So that left Liz all by herself. The ABC curse continues however... Why, you ask?

Liz Vargas has announced that she is pregnant!! and leaving the show. Remember folks, you heard it here first!

I swear I had nothing to do with her pregnancy! I would have loved having something to do with it, unfortunately her hubby and I might have problems. Yes folks, it's true... Liz is pregnant. Her and hubby, Marc Cohn, the Grammy-winning Cohn, 56, best known for his hit "Walking in Memphis," is lucky to be alive after being shot in the head last summer by a carjacker in Denver. Doctors were able to remove a bullet lodged near the singer's temple and he made a swift recovery--even appearing with his wife for a 20/20 interview. His 26-year-old assailant was later caught by police.

Geez, what is it with ABC and the news people?

Observations and Questions
Should I take over if they ask? Should I tell Liz I want to be her love slave?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1934, Tina Louise, New York NY, actress (Ginger-Gilligan's Island). And in the death notices we find in 1650, Rene Descartes, philosopher "I think therefore I am", stops thinking.
10 February 2006

WWJW? A REPRINT


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hat Would Jesus Weigh? Ok, now before I get started on this entry, I do not want to be hearing from the people that think I will be going to hell. Tell me something I don't already know. Having said that.....

But I'm a Catholic, I can't weigh that much!



A study by Perdue University and reported by ABC News, has found that some religions are made up of really fat people while others can be on the thin side. Does this mean if you are religious then you are over-weight and going to die of a heart attack?

According to the study here are the fattest people by religions from #1 the fattest to #10 the thinnest:

1. Southern Baptist
2. Church of Christ, African Methodist Episcopal/Assembly of God.
3. North American Baptist
4. Protestant-non-denominational
5. Roman Catholics, Jehovah's Witness
6. Mormon, Unitarian, Christian Scientist
7. none (I think it means "no religion")
8. Protestant, Reformation era
9. Jewish
10.Islam, Hindu and Buddhist.

Finally... that age old question: who's fatter Catholics or Jews has been finally answered. I suspect it has something to do with Knaidlech. Plus, now you can stop wondering what religion your neighbors are... just look at them, determine their weight and there you have your answer... Hmmm Sally May is one of those Southern Baptist, she weights about 250... but Miriam down the street who flaunts her 120 lbs. has to be Jewish... See? Cool, huh?

I guess to answer my original question as to how much would Jesus weigh... I believe he was Jewish. In all the paintings I've seen he always looks to be on the thin side... so that would be accurate. They also called him Rabbi and I believe in order to be called Rabbi in the Jewish faith you have to be married? But that's another posting altogether.

But seriously folks... where else but here could you get such cutting edge information?

Observations and Questions
So... where do you fit in? Are you religiously plump? Oh go ahead... today in work look at people and figure out what they are... Hey fatty, yes you, over by the donuts... you're a Southern Baptist huh?

And yes, I already know I am scraping the bottom of the barrel for things to write about. lol

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1958, Sharon Stone, Meadville PA, actress (Basic Instinct). And in our death notices we find in 1998, Buddy the Wonder Dog (Air Bud), dies of cancer at 9.
09 February 2006

WHAT?? MOVIES ARE GOING TO 35 CENTS??


S

ince today was Bill Haley's death anniversary and while downloading the music I began thinking back to when I saw this movie with Bill Haley called 'Rock Around the Clock.' So many years ago... which led me to try and think the first time I went to the movies by myself. Would you believe a first run movie was .25? A quarter! I vaguely remember when it went to .35 and everyone complained about the high price of going to the box office.

35 cents? you're kidding? i'm not paying that much!


While I can't remember the very first movie I went to by myself, I do remember certain things about it. The movie house was called the Jumbo at Front and Girard in the Fishtown section of Philly. It did only cost .25, the manager was Mr. Kelly, the usher was Camel and my grandmother was the cleaning lady. So I was kind of a celebrity. "hey, his grandmother is the cleaning lady"... "really? wow"

In addition to the featured movie, there was always the newest Flash Gordon episode with the evil Ming. Newsreels of happenings around the world, and the movie theater was always giving something away... like dishes or glasses. They even had yo-yo contests right on stage. It was a fun time.

And a darkened movie theater was an exceptionally good place to play "Army". Crawling up and down the aisles trying to capture the "other side" which comprised your friends. I think back then it was communists we captured. If you went to Catholic school back then you knew how scary the communist were...

However, if a western was playing we switched from Army to, yeah you guessed it... cowboys and robbers or Indians.

Observations and Questions
Can you remember the very first movie you ever went to see by yourself and without your parents? the name of the theater? and what was playing?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1942, Carole King [Klein], Brooklyn, NY, pianist/singer. And in the death department, we find in 1981 Bill Haley, vocalist (Rock Around Clock), dies of heart attack at 55.
08 February 2006

IL JACKSON DI MICHAEL DI CANTARE SU PAPA CD NUOVO?


C

an you imagine that? I mean really now, Michael Jackson singing on Pope John Paul's new CD? There is something just soooooo wrong in so many ways with this prospect.

i'll give it an 85. kinda hard to dance to and i don't like the beat.


John Paul is doing flip flops in his grave. On Monday, an Italian priest who runs a music label specializing in religious songs indicated that Jackson might be one of several artists to sing on a CD made up of Pope John Paul II's prayers set to music.

"It is only a hope, an idea," the Rev. Giuseppe Moscati told the Associated Press of his plans for the album, which would be released via the Edizioni Musicali Terzo Millennio label.

As consumed as he's been with his move to Bahrain, job hunt and various outings to shopping malls, it's understandable that Jackson hasn't found the time to respond to Moscati's inquiries. (Or to finish up his Hurricane Katrina relief single. But that's entirely another matter.)

The present Pope Benedict hasn't weighed in yet on this proposal. I think that will be interesting. Hey... I just thought... doesn't Scott Peterson play drums?

Observations and Questions
You know, very little in this world makes my eyes pop open... Considering ALL of the church's problems of late, I would think this is the one person that would not be on the label.

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1924, Audrey Meadows, Wu Chang, China, actress (Alice-Honeymooners). And in the death notices in 1956, Connie Mack, baseball manager (Philadelphia A's, 1901-50), dies at 93.
07 February 2006

FROM ONE EXTREME TO THE OTHER


M

an, yesterday I should have not complained about the lack of sleep I was getting. Around 3PM yesterday afternoon I decided to take a nap. BIG mistake. During my nap I vaguely remember waking up and looking at the alrm clock. 5PM... I thought that I should get up.... the next thing I remember was waking up again, only this time it was 2:30AM... 2:30AM!!!

i would have slept through the end of the world


Holy crap! My little afternoon nap lasted 11.5 hours!!

However, on the positive side, when I woke up at 2:30, I didn't have to turn on the TV, lights, computer... nothing... because they were all still on.

Made the coffee and here I am wide awake, raring to go, full of pep and energy!

Observations and Questions
Has this ever happened to you? Did anything happen yesterday or last night that I need to know?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1908, Clarence Clarence Linden "Buster" Crabbe, Oakland, CA, swimmer (Olympics-gold-1932)/actor (Tarzan the Fearless, Flash Gordon). In the death notices we find in 1993, Arthur Ashe, tennis star (Wimbledon 1975), dies of AIDS at 49.
05 February 2006

IT'S ALL OVER FOLKS TIL NEXT YEAR


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hen it starts all over again. Of course I'm talking about the Superbowl. I have to admit, I didn't watch it... for some reason if Philadelphia or Houston are not involved, it doesn't interest me. Same with the World Series. I guess I'm that Fair Weather friend you hear alot about.

but how were the commercials? I have an urge for Pizza Hut thingies...


So what did I do? This is exciting... I flipped between reruns of the Simpsons and Forensic Files... yes, I kept going back and forth between laughing and watching dead bodies on a slab in the morgue. There's got to be a connection there somewhere.

Speaking of funny and dying, I did turn back to the game at halftime to watch the Rolling Stones. I hate to say this, but guys... your age is really showing... go out gracefully before you take the stage in wheelchairs.

Earlier in the day I did take my two daughters to the Houston Zoo yesterday and that is always an adventure. The next time we go we definitely need to find a different walking route inside the zoo. I am always, always downwind of either the elephants or the rhino's. It's not pleasant at all... trust me.

However, before the zoo, we went to Mass. Now, I'm a last pew/row kinda guy at Mass. But yesterday the girls wanted front row seats. We sat in the 3rd row... on one side I had my one daughter who I think is trying out for sainthood... hands in prayer, knows all the words and responses. On the otherside of me was... let's just say she was her own vaudeville act. Making noises, "is it time to leave yet?", reading the missle upsidedown and telling me she can't find the right page. Then she did something and I started laughing. It was at this point I swear I heard the old lady behind me saying, "you are so going to burn in hell."

Finally, I looked up at the crucifix above the altar and thought, "You think this is funny, dontcha?"

Observations and Questions
What did you do yesterday? In case you've noticed that I'm not my usual bubbly self (laugh) that's because it is only 1:00AM and I've been awake since 12:30AM and can't sleep.

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date 1940, Tom Brokaw, Yankton, SD, news anchor (NBC Nightly News). And in our death notices we find in 1991, Danny Thomas, comedian/actor, dies of a heart attack at 76.

The Not So Normal Photo Gallery
New inductees into The Almost Normal Members of the Not So Normal Club Portrait Gallery are Jungle Jane from The Jungle. Then we have Carolyn from The Ginger Quill. Welcome all to our nuthouse!

GOOD SUNDAY MORNING!


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ell, yes... once again friends it's a bright and cheery Sunday morning... 3AM to be exact. I am really getting tired of this 2 and 3 AM crap... of course fallling asleep at 8PM probably don't help. I fell asleep at 8 last night simply because I woke up at 2:30AM the night before also. Bah!


SUNDAY FUNNIES


I was at the mall the other day eating at the food court. I noticed an old man watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors; green, red, orange, and blue. The old man kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find the old man staring every time. When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"

The old man didn't bat an eye in his response. He replied, "Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son."

----------

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Florida. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!"

The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!"

Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator.

Later in the day, the shopkeeper is driving home when he spots the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he sees a huge 9 foot alligator swimming quickly toward her.

She takes aim, kills the creature and with a great deal of effort hauls it on to the swamp bank. Laying nearby were several more of the dead creatures.

The shopkeeper watches in amazement. Just then the blonde flips the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Darn it, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"

Observations and Questions
Have a good day! See ya tomorrow! By the way if you happen to find yesterday's posting laying around somewhere, please return it.
04 February 2006

FEBRUARY 4TH MASSACRE OF THE BLOGS


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es, from this day forward February the 4th will be known as the February 4th Massacre of the Blogs... not to be confused with the Valentine's Day Massacre upcoming on 14 February. And we all know that story.

I've written this days blog entry 3 times and it keeps disappearing. Somehow it keeps disappearing and getting massacred somewhere else. I think it's with Jimmy Hoffa and he is reading it now.

Observations and Questions
Bah Humbug!
03 February 2006

YOU CAN THANK BLOGGER


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hy, you ask? Because I had a really great posting this morning! Yes, I was giving away $1,000.00 for the 10th comment. Giving away a dinner for 2 for the funniest comment and a trip to London for the 200th person to log onto my blog today!.

prizes galore!...today only!


However, all of a sudden Blogger decided it didn't want to co-operate and went crazy. I couldn't post, couldn't even see my blog... didn't like the music I was playing and now I am pissed and now I'm not in the mood to give anything away.

So sorry.

Now that I am in a foul mood, Blogger is working just fine and no one is going to believe me that it really was acting up this morning.

Actually I did write about some serious stuff today. In 1959 on this date, Buddy Holly, JP Richardson and Ritchie Valens all died when the plane they were in crashed on an Iowa cornfield. Commonly referred to as "the day the music died", the U.S. as a whole was shocked when it happened. So sad...

The other thing I mentioned is that today commemorates the day the Four Chaplins died in World War II. They gave knowingly gave their lives so 4 others could live. Back in my political days I was greatly honored by being admitted into the Chapel of the Four Chaplins in Philly for community service and other things. A very nice induction service and kind words.

Anyway... I was just thinking that maybe my blog problems this morning was the dreaded Kama Sutra virus that was supposed to be unleashed today. Why would anyone attach a computer virus to such an important literary piece of work. Hmmmmm.

Observations and Questions
Anything on your mind today? It's open mic day in the comments section!

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1907, James A Michener, New York NY, writer (Tales of the South Pacific, Centennial, Chesapeake, Hawaii, Space). And in the death notices we find in 1959... Buddy Holly, J.P. Richardson and Ritchie Valens died when their plane crashed in an Iowa cornfield. The day the music died.
02 February 2006

I AM SHOCKED... HONESTLY


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elieve it or not. Yes, me... a mild-mannered person living life in Houston has had his mouth jacked open... wide. I had already written and posted my blog entry for today about... Groundhog Day. It was lame and boring... but being a former native of Pa., I thought it my duty.

denny shane is finally shocked


That is until I read a story about Supreme Court Justive Sam Alito and one of his very first decisions yesterday.

Hold on you your seats please... this ride is gonna be a catastrophe.

Michael Taylor, currently a guest of the state of Missouri was scheduled to be executed last night. He wasn't... why you ask? Justice Alito sided with the majority by turning down the state's request to execute Taylor by lethal injection. It was a 6-3 vote.

Taylor was convicted of kidnapping, rape and murder of a 15 year old girl as she waited for her school bus in 1989.

The reason for the halt to the execution?? This is where your socks and any other articles of clothing will be knocked off.... Are you sitting down? Good, now get off the chair and lay on the floor because that's where you're gonna be in a few seconds... the reason... the three drugs used to perform the execution carry the risk of.... undue suffering.... which could be cruel and unusual punishment. What's next, that the needle insertion is savage and hurts too much?

What the....

Ler me ask you, Michael Taylor... did you give a rat's ass about the cruel and undue suffering YOU imposed on that girl when you and your friend repeatedly raped her? I guess you thought it merciful to put her out of her suffering after you raped her by murdering her. You scumbag... I'd have your balls and dick cut off and shoved in your mouth before executing you.

Alito has a daughter... I just wonder if...

Now look, my Groundhog Day's celebration has been totally ruined!

Observations and Questions
Am I nuts? Did I only dream this?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1948, Jessica Savitch, Kennett Square PA, news anchor (NBC) and my friend. And in the death notices we find in 1969, Boris Karloff, [Pratt], British actor (Frankenstein), dies at 81.
01 February 2006

WHEN $0 MINUS $0 EQUALS $0... FEELS SO GOOD


Y

es folks, it's getting to be that special time of year... All those smiling faces at the IRS office. It's tax time... well preparation time anyway. Years ago I had my accountant prepare my tax forms. I would go in and he always said, "How much ya want back this year?" I loved doing my taxes back then.

but 0 from 0 equals 0... how can I owe $2,452.00?


Last night I actually started my tax return. I use TurboTax which is a software designed to do it for me. I enter all of my financial information and it spits out the answer. Believe me, you should try it. I just love seeing all of those 0's.

I made up my mind as I sat down to persevere. I sweated and hoped I was doing it right. I periodically stopped to double check my information... was it correct? did I need to correct anything? was I answering all of the questions truthfully?

Finally! I got through the Name and Address part. I needed a rest. I'll get back to Part 2 today, where they want my Social Security number and other info.

Observations and Questions
Have you started yet? Owe? Refund? Are you honest? Hmmmm...can I blog from prison?

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1901, Clark Gable, Cadiz OH, actor (Gone With the Wind). And in the death notices we find in 1650, Rene Descartes, philosopher "I think therefore I am", stops thinking this date.