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31 March 2006



immicks? Do you really think I would stoop so low as to come up with a gimmick to keep you coming back to my blog? Actually, since Olga spurned my nude picture, my inquisition on Russian dating practices and all of my love emails, I decided I needed something to keep your interest.

I've come up with a great idea! This could be fun and also a subtle way to tell y'all that I have a new venture underway at The Not So Normal Gift Shop. I'm giving away one thong to one lucky reader. I know, you can't believe it, right? That's right folks, one lucky reader will be wearing one of these beautiful thongs!

How do you get your hands on one? Well, two ways actually. The first way is to buy one at The Not So Normal Gift Shop which is of course the preferred way to get one and guarantees that you do get your hot little body into one. The second way is where our little contest comes in. I need cute, funny or sexy sayings that would befit a thong... I You the bloggers will go through the entries and select whichever one I you think is the best. Not only will that saying be selected, it will also be printed and sent to you as your gift!

Simply leave your wording in the comments section. There are rules... Unfortunately there are some people who specialize in taking the fun out of things, so I have to come up with some basic rules:

Rules, Legalities and Illegalities

1. Leave your normal comments but for your contest entry make sure you start off your comment with: CONTEST ENTRY that way I hopfully won't miss it.

2. Also, you cannot steal a copywrited saying, phrase or logo from any thong/printed matter in existance. If you do and I am caught... you go down also!

3. Any rule not mentioned here but I think of later will automatically be incorporated into the rules of the contest, and not neccessarily posted.

4. All entries may or may not be used by Not So Normal Gift Store and placed on thongs/shirts/etc as I see fit. And you will not be compensated for such.

5. My Your decision on the winner is final and not open to bitching or complaining. (See last minute idea below)

6. The contest will end next Friday, 7 April 2006 at midnight. At that time, submissions submitted after that time will not be accepted, so get them in no later than midnight of Friday, 7 April 2006. I will then put on here all of the submissions and you will vote. (Method to be determined later). The winner will be announced the following during the week of: 10 April 2006.

7. Pay attention, this one could get tricky. Anonymous entries will not be considered. If you don't have a blog and I know you by name, you are still eligible. If you have a name and a ficticious blog, you will not be eligible. If you have a fictitious name but a legitimate blog you might be eligible. Plus any other variation that I may have forgotten, but to be remembered at a later date.

Small Print: Contest is void where prohibited by law and/or religious beliefs. People whose political views prohibit the wearing of thongs may not win the thong. If you live in Russia and your name is Vegakaterina or Olga, you may enter. If you are drunk/on drugs, you may enter but only once. Professional Thong Contest people are not eligible.

Contest disputes will be handled by Bellafuccio and Bellafuccio Brothers, Professional Contest Enforcers Service, of South Philly.

Now name one other blog that will give away a thong to a lucky poster for free? None, that's right folks, only here on the Not So Normal News.

STOP THE PRESSES! LAST MINUTE IDEA! I just got an idea! Why should I take the fall if your saying don't win? I think what I will do is when the contest ends, I will take all of the "sayings" received, put them all on thongs and put all of them right here. And guess what? You people will vote on which one you like best!!! That way the losers will still love me and hate you! Denny you are brilliant!

Observations and Questions
What do you think? Oh, and thong sizes come in Small, Medium and Large. White only, no colors. Good luck! Geez, running a contest is hard work... but you are all worth every minute!

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this day in 1499, Pius IV [Gianangelo de' Medici], Italian lawyer and Pope (1559-65). And in our death notices we find in 1995, Selena [Quintanilla Perez], Mexican Grammy winning singer, killed by a fan at 24.
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