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11 July 2006

I CAN'T THINK OF AN APPROPRIATE HEADLINE


O

nce again that modern wonder of all wonders, television has brought forth a story that astounded me. Last week I wrote a story and said, "Nothing can surprise me anymore." I was soooooooo wrong.

I watched this show about a man living in Europe somewhere... not the astonishing part. His wife died after a long illness... nope, not the astonishing part. After a few years he developed cancer... nope, not yet. It seems that he developed this cancer only in his penis. Ok, ok, I swear this isn't a joke... did ya hear about the man that got cancer in his penis?" The man was not happy because the doctor informed him that in order to stop the cancer, they had to amputate his penis. Ouch!

So what did they do? I mean come on... his manhood... gone. A life of sitting down to pee, never to stand up like a man. Here comes the astonishing part... they decided to cut off the middle finger of his right hand and sew it on where it belonged down below and he now had a brand new penis. Yes... he now had a penis and he could once again stand and pee. Somehow they fashioned his finger to look like one. Cut a little hole in his fingertip so he could urinate.

Now the man can give people the finger AND flash them at the same time! According to the story, he recently got engaged. I swear this is a true story and I am not making this up.

Observations and Questions
Question: Ladies... if you were single and dating and you met a guy... would you? Men... Sorry, I can't even think of an appropriate question here.

Birth Announcements and Dusty Death Notices
Born this date in 1956 Sela Ward, actress, (Hilary-Emerald Point NAS). And in the death notices in 1989 Sir Laurence Olivier acting great, dies at 82.

Holidays and Special Dates Today Around the World
Appleton Cheshire, England: Bawming the Thorn Day
Dahomey, Ivory Coast, Niger, Upper Volta: Independence Day (1960)
Mongolia: National Day (1921)
North Belgium: Flemish Day
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